As if Michael Vick didn't have enough troubles, he may have to fork over $63 billion — that's billion, with a B — if one Jonathan Lee Riches prevails in court.
The aptly named Riches' lawsuit against Vick, filed this week in U.S. District Court in Richmond, was handwritten. That's because Riches is currently a guest of the Graybar Hotel in South Carolina (it's not clear which town; his handwriting's a little hard to read).
The lawsuit does not explain what landed Riches in the clink, but does spell out a number of dastardly allegations: that Vick supposedly stole Riches' dogs for dogfighting purposes, opened credit cards in Riches' name and stole his copyrighted property. ("Mr. Vick uses my name to sell T-shirts," the suit alleges at one point).
Now Michael Vick is a wealthy man...however he certainly does not have $63 billion. But if these allegations are true, it might explain why Vick is so hell-bent on self- imploding:
Riches claims that Vick sold the pilfered pooches on eBay and used the proceeds to purchase missles from the Iranian government, that he has "plead (sic) allegiance to Al-quaeda" and has subjected Riches to "microwave testing."
Well, this all explains so much. Note that Michael Vick is especially adept at running away from armored warriors who try to catch him, his accuracy sucks, he hides behind innocent men while lobbing bombs indiscriminately at dubious targets and he is well-trained in biological warfare.