Tuesday, December 9, 2008

An update...

...for our four readers out there! A shout out to all of you!

I have suffered from blogging burnout. It's temporary, and I should be back typing away when I get this stick out of my ass shortly.

Random thoughts and things I should go ahead and let y'all know...

There is now a future Mrs. Nigel. Yeah, hard to believe that there is a woman out there who can meet my impossibly high standards (she has to like me). And I have hit the future wife lottery. The future Mrs. Nigel is MUCH too pretty for a slob like me, and...believe me I am struggling with this reality...she totally digs on me. And most of all...she loves football!

How could I not marry that woman?

No...really. She exists. I promise it. In fact, I've shared her photo with a few of my blogging buddies...will y'all vouch for me? Someone? Anyone?

Because unlike this blogger, I don't make stuff up just to get attention.

Now about "Kaylee"...I fell for her "plight" hook, line and sinker. I've spent hours praying for her, and I've linked her twice. And now I don't know what I should be feeling. Should I feel pity for her because her life is so pathetic that she needs to create such amazing dramas...and her grasp of reality will soon be wasted because the New York Times will not be around to offer her employment? Should I feel anger because I was duped like libtards who thought Obama really meant that "hope and change" thing?

Or should I suggest her to The Atlantic...since her bullshit is actually more reality-based than theirs is?

(Time out whilst I adjust that stick...)

I don't talk about this much...and Lord knows I should...but I am an evangelical Christian. Yeah...I know...my witness as it pertains to this blog pretty much sucks. Still, I have my strong beliefs in Jesus and the Bible. Which is why this doesn't scare me at all. Because this is what is supposed to happen. Israel and Iran going to slug it out soon? You bet your ass they will.

(A shout out to Yiddish...hey bro, ain't no separation of church and blog here, but when it comes to Armageddon I'm getting behind a Jew until Jesus hauls my butt out of here. Cuz' I know God has your back.)

If Sarah Palin doesn't pick Bobby Jindal as her running mate in 2012, she'd be foolish not to pick this guy:

On college football: This BCS thing sucks. I can't think of a single reason why Oklahoma is playing for a national championship while Texas is playing a crappy Fiesta Bowl against Ohio State. Obama is in favor of a playoff system for college football. I might actually vote for him in 2012 if he makes that happen.

OK, but let's say for argument's sake that Texas screwed themselves out of playing for that championship by losing to Texas Tech. Fine. Why the hell aren't they playing Alabama in the Sugar Bowl? If the entire purpose of this BCS bullshit was to create the best games, then why not actually do that?

So what fueled this little outburst? Insomnia. I'm not worried about an Obama Presidency, or the world's economy completely falling apart, or a fighter jet dropping on my house...

Nope. Primarily what is keeping me up is last night's dream where I was in Rupert Holmes' band. I am not making that up. Of course I could have had a dream I was in a cool band like Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers or Men Without Hats...but no. Rupert Freakin' Holmes. You know...this one-hit wonder:

Tell me that wouldn't keep you up.

Oh. And about 15 Coke Zeros today.


B Smith said...

Welcome back. I sort of wondered what the hell was going on.
1. Congratulations on your imminent (I'll be nice, here...) betrothal. That in itsself, I think, would explain the lack of bloggage...better things to concentrate on! I wish you all the happiness, bud.
2. World government scares me, because I know (or at least, I have some idea) what kind of problems and privations will come as a result. I'm counting on my towering outrage and anger to help me get through the fear, though. If nothing else, I'll meet you in heaven, eh?
3. If Palin runs with Jindal (or, as some have suggested, Ted Nugent), my vote goes there. But if not, and your YT guy runs (what IS his name, anyway?? He's gooood.), I'm all over it, like a hobo on a ham sandwich :-D
4. Easy on the Coke Zero. that sh*t will kill you.

PS--Rupert Holmes??? Seek psychiatric help. Fast.

Nigel said...

B-man...I'm afraid there isn't any help on the Rupert Holmes thing.

At least it got better last night. I got traded to "Firefall"...

Yiddish Steel said...

I knew it had something to do with the new Mrs. Tuffnel. Mazel Tov! L'Chaim!

Texas got screwed by the BCS?? So did USC. Someone please explain to me how Florida losing at home to a very flaccid team like Ole Miss gets you redemption? USC loses on the road to Oregon State. It's all bogus. USC will pummel Penn State, and Ohio State will do what they do best on New Year's Day (or in any BCS game, for that matter), and embarrass themselves.

Rupert Holmes?! What next? Your next dream sountrack features the song "Pop Muzik" by "M"?!

CB said...

Hey Nigel, don't you know that women are attracted to funny (and witty) guys? Not all pretty girls are shallow enough to make looks their top priority when choosing a mate. The future Mrs. Nigel is just as lucky to have you as you are to have her and I bet she knows it!

Nigel said...

Thanks CB...Honestly I still gotta say that I WAY overachieved in pulling the future Mrs. Nigel.

B Smith said...

CB: So THAT is my problem...
(Can't even get wit the shallow girls, 'cause I look like a train wreck. O well, there's always more beer.)

CB said...

Don't worry, B Smith - there's someone out there for everyone. The hard part is finding each other! Have you tried match.com?