Sunday, December 14, 2008

I Stole This From the AP! The Stupidest Paragraph Ever Written

I believe this officially ends the global warming debate:

Ironically, 2008 is on pace to be a slightly cooler year in a steadily rising temperature trend line. Experts say it's thanks to a La Nina weather variation. While skeptics are already using it as evidence of some kind of cooling trend, it actually illustrates how fast the world is warming.

I give up.

Update: Brian at Six Meat Buffet says all of the things I was thinking, but was too exasperated to express (either that, or he's just a freakin' more good writer than me):

So when it’s hot outside it’s a sign of global warming and when it’s cold outside that actually means that it’s warming even faster than when it’s hot outside.

How do we know when global warming has been halted? When it’s hot outside all the time? That’s the only logic there.

From the people bitching about color-coded terror alerts for 7 years, the environmental fearmongering scale only has one setting - Fire Engine shit your pants, we’re all going to die Red.

Thanks Associated Press “science writer” Seth Borenstein. I’m pretty sure that column counts as the co-pay for a rhetorical hysterectomy administered by an amateur veternarian.

1 comment:

Brian said...

All I know is that I'm not better than anyone else. Except possibly Seth Boringstein, Assistant Vice-Vagina of the AP's Planetary Poontanger Defense League.

Let's thow "Czar" in there too. A program won't work if we don't have a czar running it.