Don't leave Al Gore (PBUH) alone with your kids

Glenn Beck makes one GREAT point. How can a former Vice President of the United States meet with 3 THOUSAND kids...and nobody in the media is covering it?:

The definition of stupidity...

...is being a global warming alarmist who decides to have a "sky is falling" conference in...Buffalo.

In February:

Talk about great timing.

Buffalo State College hosts the national teach-in on Global Warming Situations today — a day the local temperature bottomed out at minus 6 degrees.

No evidence of global warming here, at least not this morning, when unofficial reports to the National Weather Service listed temperatures as low as 9 degrees below zero elsewhere in Erie County.

Meanwhile, Al Gore (PBUH) is busy telling your kids to ignore their parents:

Fox News lists 10 biggest fools of 2008

Interesting...Al Gore did not make the list.

Who did?:

Media mogul Ted Turner
Loch Ness Monster hunter Robert Rines
New Zealand Scientist Jim Salinger
Zoologist Gordon Rodda
University of Texas at Dallas Professor Tom Brikowski
Japanese whaling researchers
University of Florida's George Burgess
Congressman Edward Markey (D-Mass)
Explorer Jon Bowermaster
Sea life curator Alex Gerrard

Global Warming brutalizes Denver

Via Drudge...

I'm not sayin' a thing.

I Stole This From the AP! The Stupidest Paragraph Ever Written

I believe this officially ends the global warming debate:

Ironically, 2008 is on pace to be a slightly cooler year in a steadily rising temperature trend line. Experts say it's thanks to a La Nina weather variation. While skeptics are already using it as evidence of some kind of cooling trend, it actually illustrates how fast the world is warming.

I give up.

Update: Brian at Six Meat Buffet says all of the things I was thinking, but was too exasperated to express (either that, or he's just a freakin' more good writer than me):

So when it’s hot outside it’s a sign of global warming and when it’s cold outside that actually means that it’s warming even faster than when it’s hot outside.

How do we know when global warming has been halted? When it’s hot outside all the time? That’s the only logic there.

From the people bitching about color-coded terror alerts for 7 years, the environmental fearmongering scale only has one setting - Fire Engine shit your pants, we’re all going to die Red.

Thanks Associated Press “science writer” Seth Borenstein. I’m pretty sure that column counts as the co-pay for a rhetorical hysterectomy administered by an amateur veternarian.

Al Gore...where ARE you?

From the Drudge Report...it's freakin' COLD!:

Oregon:

Cold temperatures set several new record lows this weekend, including a low of 22 Saturday in downtown Pendleton that broke a 118 year-old record of 24.

Record lows started falling Thursday with a new low of 20 for Meacham, four degrees cooler than the previous record from 2006, according to information from the Web site for the National Weather Service Forecast Office in Pendleton.

Heppner and Long Creek then set new low temperatures Friday. Heppner hit 29, the coldest that date has seen since 1960 when it was 30; and Long Creek was 21, besting the 1987 record by four degrees.

Saturday set multiple new lows, including the record 22 in downtown Pendleton. John Day dropped to 21, breaking the 1990 record of 23; Meacham's 15 broke the previous low of 20 from 2002; and Mitchell set a record with 21, five degrees cooler than the 2002 record.

Additionally, the top of Airport Hill in Pendleton set a new low of 25; the previous record was 33. And the agricultural experimental station north of Pendleton recorded a low of 18, five degrees cooler than the previous record from 1990.

The cold continued to set records Sunday. Meacham, for the third time in four days, set a record with a low of 15, one degree cooler than the 2002 record. Long Creek and Mitchell again set new records as well Long Creek's low of 21 broke with 1969 record of 25, and Mitchell's 21 broke the 1949 record of 24.

The top of Airport Hill in Pendleton also set another record with 24; the previous record was 28 from 2002. And downtown Pendleton's 21 chilled past the previous record of 25 from 1931.

Also Sunday, two-miles north of Hermiston cooled to 18, breaking the 1953 record of 20.

California:

Temperatures dropped to 31 degrees in the Ukiah Valley on Saturday night and early Sunday morning, the coldest Oct. 12 morning since record keeping began in Ukiah in 1893, said Troy Nicolini, a meteorologist with the National Weather Service in Eureka. The previous record was 34 degrees in 1916.

Farmers in Redwood Valley and other cooler regions in Mendocino County reported temperatures as low as 27 degrees.

Alaska:

Two hundred years of glacial shrinkage in Alaska, and then came the winter and summer of 2007-2008.

Unusually large amounts of winter snow were followed by unusually chill temperatures in June, July and August.

Never before in the history of a research project dating back to 1946 had the Juneau Icefield witnessed the kind of snow buildup that came this year. It was similar on a lot of other glaciers too.

Just sayin'...

Global Warming causes earliest snowfall ever in Boise, Idaho

Is there any other explanation for this?:

Big snow flakes fell early Friday evening, turning Downtown Boise into a giant snow globe for people on their way home from work....

Photo courtesy of Idaho Statesman

This is the earliest measurable snowfall in Boise since recordkeeping began in 1898, according to the National Weather Service. At 10 p.m., the Weather Service said 1.7 inches of snow had fallen.

The previous earliest recorded snowfall was Oct. 12, 1969, when a little more than an inch fell.

Right now global warming just forced me to put on a sweatshirt...we all know how brutal SoCal autumns can be.

Global Warming bears down on Minnesota, Wisconsin (Updated)

Damn that Global Warming...is there no end to the havoc it wreaks?

Here's some news you probably hoped you wouldn't hear for another four months.

The National Weather Service says areas of northeast Minnesota and northwest Wisconsin could see patchy frost this weekend. That's right, patchy frost in August.

The weather agency says clear skies could allow temperatures to dip into the low to mid-30s late tonight into early Monday.

Frost.

In August.

Just sayin'...



Update: Michigan too!

White folks to blame for the effects of Global Warming on minorities

Via Modern Pharisee, this comes from LaShawn Barber:

Have you heard about this? In a 59-page report titled, A Climate of Change: African Americans, Global Warming, and a Just Climate Policy in the U.S. (PDF), the left-leaning Joint Center for Political and Economic Studies tries to make the case that global warming disproportionately impacts black people...

...I grabbed the bait, and now I’m stuck on the hook. Help!...

...“African Americans are thirteen percent of the U.S. population and on average emit nearly twenty percent less greenhouse gases than non-Hispanic whites per capita. Though far less responsible for climate change, African Americans are significantly more vulnerable to its effects than non-Hispanic whites. Health, housing, economic well-being, culture, and social stability are harmed from such manifestations of climate change as storms, floods, and climate variability. African Americans are also more vulnerable to higher energy bills, unemployment, recessions caused by global energy price shocks, and a greater economic burden from military operations designed to protect the flow of oil to the U.S.”

LaShawn wasn't making that report up:

Blowhard hypocrite of the decade?

C'mon...it's gotta be Algore (PBUH):



Update: The Moron-in-Chief has a better characterization of Algore (PBUH)

And Moron Pundit blogging over at DPUD has another...

Michelle Malkin has more...

Well...shit! What do we do now?

Seriously. I am cooking in this freakin' 62 degree heat this morning.

I have long stopped using hairspray because I was told that the propellants in it were harming the ozone layer and polluting our skies.

(Oh...and because I am now bald, but mostly because I didn't want to pollute our skies)

And I've stopped using fireplaces...because I was told all of that smoke contributed to global warming.

(Oh...and because I no longer live in a home that has a fireplace, but mostly because I didn't want to contribute to global warming)

Now what?

GOODBYE air pollution and smoky chimneys, hello brighter days. That's been the trend in Europe for the past three decades - but unfortunately cleaning up the skies has allowed more of the sun's rays to pierce the atmosphere, contributing to at least half the warming that has occurred.

Since 1980, average air temperatures in Europe have risen 1 °C: much more than expected from greenhouse-gas warming alone. Christian Ruckstuhl of the Institute for Atmospheric and Climate Science in Switzerland and colleagues took aerosol concentrations from six locations in northern Europe, measured between 1986 and 2005, and compared them with solar-radiation measurements over the same period. Aerosol concentrations dropped by up to 60 per cent over the 29-year period, while solar radiation rose by around 1 watt per square metre (Geophysical Research Letters, DOI: 10.1029/2008GL034228).

"The decrease in aerosols probably accounts for at least half of the warming over Europe in the last 30 years," says Rolf Philipona, a co-author of the study at MeteoSwiss, Switzerland's national weather service.

I give up. Living as a California Eco-Weenie is just too freakin' hard...and too damn competitive.

(HT for all of the green hilarity to Hot Air Headlines)

Global warming causes Mt. Shasta glaciers to grow

Nope. Not another one of my snarky and ironic headlines, nor a sarcastic post. Some dilweed academic weenie actually says that global warming is causing ice to grow on Mt. Shasta:

While it's not California's tallest mountain, the tongues of ice creeping down Shasta's volcanic flanks give the solitary mountain another distinction. Its seven glaciers, referred to by American Indians as the footsteps made by the creator when he descended to Earth, are the only historical glaciers in the continental U.S. known to be growing.

With global warming causing the retreat of glaciers in the Sierra Nevada, the Rocky Mountains and elsewhere in the Cascades, Mt. Shasta is actually benefiting from changing weather patterns over the Pacific Ocean.

"When people look at glaciers around the world, the majority of them are shrinking," said Slawek Tulaczyk, an assistant professor of earth sciences at the University of California, Santa Cruz. "These glaciers seem to be benefiting from the warming ocean."

Sorry...that loud piercing sound you just heard was my global warming bullshit detector going off.

So the AP (and no, screw you AP, I am not paying you for your material...send me a freakin' bill) claims that global warming is the cause for MORE ice, and the most qualified scientist they can find to back this claim is some assistant professor at the most liberal college in California?

Yeah, yeah...he is totally qualified because this yutz has been studying ice his entire life. Anyone want to hazard a guess at whether Slawek has been receiving any global warming grant money?

I mean, Slawek, do you actually have any data to back that stupid claim up (other than ice is growing on Mt. Shasta, and we know that our earth is warming, so it MUST be benefiting from it), or did you just pull that theory out of your ass?

I mean, what else could have changed his tune from back in 2002 when he and his partner were mystified at Mt. Shasta's refusal to let manmade global warming reduce its glaciers?

Authored by Ian Joughin, a geologist with the Jet Propulsion Laboratory at the California Institute of Technology and Slawek Tulaczyk, a professor of earth sciences at the University of California Santa Cruz, the study found that the ice sheet is gaining 26.8 billions tons of ice a year.

Much like Doran, Joughin sounded almost regretful about his scientific findings, recognizing that it contradicts the global warming orthdoxy.

"It could be this part of the ice sheet is not necessarily sensitive to global warming," he said.

Or better yet, it could be that you're just full of shit.

And the first Gold Medal of the 2008 Olympics should go to...

...China.

For this:

What's remarkable isn't that China is now the world's #1 producer of greenhouse gasses. The truly unbelievable thing is that Al Gore and his minions criticized the United States severely for not signing the Kyoto agreement.

Of course, they never got around to mentioning that Kyoto never included China or India in its strictures.

Lien Chen takes the lead during the Women's 1600KM bicycle race at China's Olympic qualfying

Well crap. When the hell is Algore (PBUH) going to fly his private jet to Bejing to tell the Chinese that they are killing Mother Earth?

Just sayin'...

From Rick Moran:

In an interview for the History Channel program "Earth at Risk," Gore says with a straight face in answer to a question about Chinese immunity from Kyoto that the US should adopt the Kyoto protocols even if China doesn't participate "to set a good example" to the Chinese. This, Gore believes, would have so moved the Chinese that they would voluntarily cut their own emissions.

And this guy would have been president on 9/11.

Will Algore (PBUH) risk getting punked?

My bet is...no:

Washington - Czech President Vaclav Klaus said Tuesday he is ready to debate Al Gore about global warming, as he presented the English version of his latest book that argues environmentalism poses a threat to basic human freedoms.

"I many times tried to talk to have a public exchange of views with him, and he's not too much willing to make such a conversation," Klaus said. "So I'm ready to do it."

Al? The ball is in your court.

Yeah...it's all MY fault

Can this global warming garbage get any more stupid?

As if they didn’t already have enough problems on their hands fat people are now being blamed for global warming.

British scientists say they use up more fuel to transport them around and the amount of food they eat requires more energy to produce than that consumed by those on smaller diets.

According to a team at the London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine this adds to food shortages and higher energy prices.

Researchers Phil Edwards said: “We are all becoming heavier and it is a global responsibility. Obesity is a key part of the big picture."

Well...damn. Nothing like a huge dose of guilt to begin my week.

Here I am at a UCLA football game last October suffering from the ravages of global warming. I have nobody to blame but myself.

I'll tell you what. I am going on a diet today...to save the earth! My car (even with my fat ass in it) already gets 25-27 mpg., I live in a small 1 bedroom apartment that uses miniscule(compared to global warming prophet Algore...PBUH) amounts of energy...but I guess I am just not doing enough to save Mother Planet.

I'm not doing this for me, or my health...I'm doing it for the Polar Bear, Great Tits, and the future of our earth. Y'all can thank me now...

(my old college roommate, TR emails to remind me to credit him for the photo. So TR, consider yourself credited, as long as you don't mind me telling my four readers that you were drunk off your ass on Captain Morgans and Red Stripes)

Confused penguins create credibility problem for MSNBC's story on global warming (Updated with original unedited video)

2nd Update: Hardee Har Har, MSNBC. Thanks to Hot Air commenter SilverStar830, we've found your original unedited version. Penguins arrive about 28 seconds in.

You tools:

Penguins
by krs601

Update: Looks like MSNBC is taking lessons from Trinity Church and the Associated Press in trying to cover their tracks. Good thing for screenshots, huh?

15-year old Camilla Hempleman-Adams went to the North Pole to ski...specifically to become the youngest woman ever to ski the North Pole.

Unfortunately, she's also been drinking the global warming Kool-Aid, so MSNBC thought it would be the perfect story to further push their "green" garbage:





Uh...did you catch that footage about 45 seconds in? Are those...penguins?:

According to MSNBC: Penguins set adrift on North Pole ice floe because of global warming

Someone might want to remind those stupid penguins that they are at the WRONG pole! Sheesh!

Of course maybe they are migrating North because of the increasing ice sheet accumulating at the South Pole.

Which would confuse me too, since apparently melting ice means global warming...and so does MORE ice:

Some scientists say trends in sea ice in key spots around the continent may be bellwethers for worrisome changes that could accelerate the melt of nearby land ice, most notably the West Antarctic Ice Sheet.

But before you think I am harshing on penguins...I understand how confused they can get:

Click to make bigger if your eyesight is as bad as mine

So if you see a lost and disoriented penguin, you may want to steer clear. Lost penguins can be a handful:

Global Warming...please come back!

Playing golf today...and I'll be freezing my ass off:

Click if image is too small for your piss-poor eyesight

Update: Played my round. I'm dethawing now. If I ever meet Algore (PBUH), I'm slamming him square in the nuts.

Just sayin'

I'd probably be a little more tolerant towards the global warming Chicken Littles if they actually practiced what they preached:



HT: ChamberPost

Global Warming devastating...uh...ah forget it...

Hey Algore (PBUH), where are you hiding?:

Snow cover over North America and much of Siberia, Mongolia and China is greater than at any time since 1966.

The U.S. National Climatic Data Center (NCDC) reported that many American cities and towns suffered record cold temperatures in January and early February. According to the NCDC, the average temperature in January "was -0.3 F cooler than the 1901-2000 (20th century) average."

China is surviving its most brutal winter in a century. Temperatures in the normally balmy south were so low for so long that some middle-sized cities went days and even weeks without electricity because once power lines had toppled it was too cold or too icy to repair them.

I'm sure you have all seen the PBS or National Geographic special reports on this crisis.

What?

You mean there isn't one?

From Noel Sheppard at Newsbusters:

Makes one wonder how climate alarmists will spin the winter of 2008 so as to keep alive their precious global warming myth...

I bet you hadn't heard that the ice in the Arctic has mysteriously returned. Why do you think that is?

Want to know what else has returned? The snow to Mt. Kilimanjaro:

But media won't tell you about that, either.

H/T: Ace of Spades' fabulous left column headlines

Saudi Arabia under the grips of unbearable Global Warming

Don't speak Arabic? Let me translate for you:

Where is that ****ing Al Gore so I can stick his head up a camel's ass?!?!:





See...this is what I get for not reading Newsbusters every single day. From Noel Sheppard:

The selective coverage of international weather events by global warming obsessed media continued this weekend as near-record low temperatures in Saudi Arabia mixed with snow went totally ignored by American press outlets.

This goes quite counter to the vast amount of coverage any climate event anywhere on the face of the planet receives if it can be used to support Nobel Laureate Al Gore's alarmist theories.

As such, although Russia's RIA Novosti reported on Friday rare weather conditions in Saudi Arabia, it certainly wasn't surprising that, according to Google News, not one American press outlet found it newsworthy (emphasis added):

Northern parts of Saudi Arabia are covered with snow with schools, mosques and administrative bodies paralyzed, local media reported Friday.

The oil-rich kingdom is being hit with subzero temperatures and snow storms with freezing winds of up to 50 km/h (30mp/h). Some regions have been experiencing problems with water supplies as pipes have frozen, and livestock has died from the cold.

The Saudi Gazette reported late in December that the winter was expected to last 89 days, with temperatures reaching below zero. National media said the winter is the coldest in the country for 20 years.

Hmmm. Coldest in 20 years. I guess that's why our press are disinterested.

Think they'd ignore Saudi Arabia if the temperatures were the warmest in 20 years?

No, I don't either.

Someone please tell me that isn't a woman pushing the car here...