I just realized that the last time I spent any time alone in your home, I was about 16 years old. Way too young (and too straight edge) to actually raid the liquor cabinet. You see, I've only been in your lovely home for two hours and already I have had two rum and cokes, given myself a manicure with your nail stuff, showered with your wonderful bath gels and shampoos, drenched my hair with your mousse, and used your perfume. Next I will dry my hair and put curlers in it. After that I'm going to stuff my face with Oreos, and dance around singing all the songs from Grease at the top of my lungs. Then I'm going to see if you have some frozen peas so I can stuff them up my nose and shoot them at the kids. This is so rad!
Your Loving Daughter,
P.S. I'm so glad you don't read this blog.
P.P.S. And Nigel thought this place needed a girl's touch. Ha.