Keith Olbermann...fair and balanced. (Updated)

Last night Keith Olbermann "covered" the discovery of a car bomb in London's Picadilly Circus. He brought on terrorism "expert" Larry Johnson:





Of course Olbermann doesn't bother to mention Johnson's credentials as an "expert". Fortunately, Ace of Spades handles that for us. Make sure you check the date on this:

"Judging from news reports and the portrayal of villains in our popular entertainment, Americans are bedeviled by fantasies about terrorism. They seem to believe that terrorism is the greatest threat to the United States and that it is becoming more widespread and lethal. They are likely to think that the United States is the most popular target of terrorists. And they almost certainly have the impression that extremist Islamic groups cause most terrorism.

"None of these beliefs are based in fact. ... While terrorism is not vanquished, in a world where thousands of nuclear warheads are still aimed across the continents, terrorism is not the biggest security challenge confronting the United States, and it should not be portrayed that way."

--Larry C. Johnson, "The Declining Terrorist Threat," New York Times, July 10, 2001. Johnson, a former CIA officer, was deputy director of the U.S. State Department's Office of Counterterrorism from 1989 to 1993.

Next week, the greatest journalist since Edward R. Murrow has slated an impressive list of topics and guest "experts":


Monday:

Nutrition "expert" and psychologist Barry Bonds on the paranoia surrounding the effects of steroid abuse

Tuesday:

America's new morality...the Hollywood example. "Expert" sociologist Lindsay Lohan tells us why American values are outdated.

Wednesday:

"Expert" ethicist Mike Nifong on legal integrity: What is due process anyway?

Thursday:

Animal rights activist and "expert" Michael Vick on Your Dog...the need for tough love

The greatest journalist since Edward R. Murrow has a special treat for us on Friday:

"Expert" marriage consultant Bill Clinton on The vows of matrimony. How important are they, really?

If anyone out there gets wind of future "experts" scheduled to appear on Countdown, please let us know (in the comment box).

(Update) Nothing to see here. Move along. According to Larry Johnson and the greatest journalist since Edward R. Murrow, threats like this are just in our heads:

Two people are being held after a burning Jeep was rammed through the terminal building at Glasgow airport.

Sky sources say the incident is being treated as a terrorist strike, and armed police have now closed off Blackpool airport.

The suspects have been described. We can all relax...the suspects are "Asian", not Middle Eastern Islamists:

Eyewitnesses have described a Jeep Cherokee being driven at speed towards the building with flames coming out from underneath.

They have also described seeing two Asian men, one of whom was on fire, who had been in the car.

We've Stopped the Shamnesty...now it's time for a pardon

Ragnar at The Jawa Report has a series of videos on the ridiculous incarceration of Border Patrol agents Jose Compean and Ignacio Ramos.

Watch moron U.S. Attorney Johnny Sutton(who chose to believe an ILLEGAL ALIEN DRUG DEALER) try to defend his actions.

President George Bush has already lost the respect of millions of his supporters because of his amnesty push. It's time for him to quit pandering to the Mexican Government and illegal aliens and DO THE RIGHT THING.

Pardon agents Compean and Ramos. Now. This travesty has gone on long enough.

Old Skool Miller Time!

Whilst bopping around youtube for Miller's appearance on O'Reilly Wednesday, I tripped across this gem (language warning):



I'll post part two next Friday...

Payback...it's gonna be a bitch

We're gonna remember come election time:



Like I need an excuse to post some AC/DC...

BANG! Shamnesty Bill is DEAD! (Updated)

Today the Senate voted 53-46 to kill the Amnesty/Shamnesty bill...


Hot Air plans a celebration... make sure you scroll all the way down for it!


This Goes to 11's Celebration:






Preston at Six Meat Buffet has a suggestion for the President:

Message to Junior: Now that you’ve gotten your nose rubbed in it, why don’t you quit being a dick and build the fence?

The cleanest of Ace's celebrations:

(Update): 2008 Presidential pretender Sam Brownback actually voted for cloture before he voted against it. From Michelle Malkin:

Vote-switching weasel Sam Brownback should really just end his presidential campaign bid right now and stop wasting his poor staff’s time.

I wonder how Sam "Switchback" will spin that during the next debate. Anything like this guy?

Sean Hannity exposes Ohio Senator as a total tool...(Updated)

If you are from Ohio, you should be totally embarassed...

"You don't intimidate George Voinovich!"

Newsflash, George. After this, your political career is over.

Voinovich explains why he hasn't even read the amnesty bill...and his bad taste in ties

(H/T Hot Air)

(Update) Apparently the voters of Ohio just intimidated Voinovich ...he voted NO on the 2nd Cloture vote.

Mel Martinez: Time to "Move On"

Watching C-Span this morning (which I admit, I rarely do) in anticipation of the 2nd cloture vote on the Shamnesty Bill....and Mel Martinez just said, "We have an opportunity today to move debate forward...to move on..."


Whoa.



Sounds like...

Who thinks Mel has actually read the bill?

Mel Martinez wants us to "move on"

Michelle Malkin is live blogging the debate and vote.

AP cherry picks comments by Coulter; Elizabeth Edwards helps her sell more books (Updated)

Ann Coulter doesn't need any help defending herself. But today the Associated Press and Elizabeth Edwards provide more evidence to Coulter's assertion that there is a double standard when it comes to freedom of speech.


First, the lead from yesterday's Associated Press story:

RALEIGH, N.C. (June 27) - Elizabeth Edwards pleaded Tuesday with Ann Coulter to "stop the personal attacks," a day after the conservative commentator said she wished Edwards' husband, Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards, had been killed by terrorists.

Except...that's not what Ann said. Here is the transcript of Coulter's appearance on Good Morning America, courtesy of Newsbusters:

CHRIS CUOMO (ABC NEWS) (Off-camera) All right. And joining us now is political commentator, Ann Coulter, whose book 'Godless: The Church of - Liberalism," what did I almost say there, liberalism, is out in paperback. There it is. A conservative's conservative, she's had some tough words lately for her own party.

GRAPHICS: COULTER'S TAKE

CHRIS CUOMO (ABC NEWS) (Off-camera) But to begin with the tough words, some tough words for you by the three top candidates in response to what you had said, some were calling it a homosexual slur, you said it was a taunt. They all came out when you were talking about John Edwards and said, 'This was wrong. We must deny it." Fair criticism of you or a shift towards the tolerant among the GOP?

ANN COULTER (POLITICAL COMMENTATOR) No, no. There were, I was denounced all over. All over. I think the one that hurt the most was, was from I'mALittleGirlInAPinkPartyDress.com.

CHRIS CUOMO (ABC NEWS) Off-camera) Why?

ANN COULTER (POLITICAL COMMENTATOR) Very upsetting.

CHRIS CUOMO (ABC NEWS) (Off-camera) You...

ANN COULTER (POLITICAL COMMENTATOR) Though about the same time Bill Maher said - and by the way, I did not call John Edwards the F-word. I said I couldn't talk about him because you go into rehab for using that word.

CHRIS CUOMO (ABC NEWS) (Off-camera) You say you were you - you were joking.

ANN COULTER (POLITICAL COMMENTATOR) About the - oh yeah. I wouldn't, I wouldn't insult gays by comparing them to John Edwards. Now, that would be mean. But about the same time, you know, Bill Maher was not joking and saying he wished Dick Cheney had been killed in a terrorist attack. So I've learned my lesson. If I'm gonna say anything about John Edwards in the future, I'll just wish he had been killed in a terrorist assassination plot.

So this is what gets posted on the Edward's campaign website:






Why did the Edwards camp post that cleverly edited clip? Fundraising of course! Guess they haven't raised enough Coulter Cash.

Of course that wasn't enough. Next up...Elizabeth Edwards:




Coulter asks why Silky Pony didn't call himself. Ann would have blasted John into the stratosphere had he called, but Elizabeth is untouchable because she has cancer. And don't forget, the Edwards campaign is not above using Elizabeth to scrape together a little cash.

Of course the one who is laughing all the way to the bank right now is...Ann Coulter. Godless just went paperback, and she probably sold 100,000 extra copies thanks to Elizabeth Edwards.

Newsbusters is all over this story, and reminds us that it's awfully ironic that the Edwards campaign is so upset over Coulter's "hate speech".

(Update): Hot Air has the video...even Coulter-friendly Fox News is taking Ann's quote out of context.

The big fat ass needs to lose some weight update...

Oh yeah...that would be me.

Anyway, I had my follow up appointment today with the doctor. Looks like I am in pretty darn good health after all.

I've lost 18 lbs since my medical scare...all by avoiding the garbage I was eating before. I haven't seen a chip, french fry, scoop of ice cream or slice of bacon since my trip to the hospital. And I'm not really craving those things either.

My doc cleared me to exercise. I get a fair amount of exercise anyway from my coaching activities and my occasional rounds of golf, but I intend on stepping up my time on the stairmaster. My goal is to drop another 30lbs before my next appointment in November.

My blood sugar is a little high...but I fell considerably short of being on Diabetes alert. My doctor was at first concerned about that, but now is comfortable that a change in diet alone will keep me away from the insulin needle. Also, my once skyrocketing blood pressure has been measuring at or below normal in the past week. And my cholesterol is actually below average as well.

The lone concern...I have a small heartbeat irregularity. The cardiologist who reviewed my results believes it is nothing to get too alarmed about...but I am to return for more tests if I have even mild chest pain or tightness, or shortness of breath. But there doesn't seem to be any arterial blockage at all...so basically I am in good health.

Oh yeah. Except for the fact that I am still too darn fat. But I'm working on that...

A contrast in dignity

Mary Sanchez of the Kansas City Star is a liberal who writes for a liberal rag newspaper. But Sanchez pens this tasteful rememberance of an American Hero, and the story of the "other" parent who chose a different path to honor his fallen son:

Poetry and lore speak of a mother’s grief, a mother’s tears for a deceased child. So perhaps the spotlight was bound to be captured by Cindy Sheehan after her soldier-son’s death in 2004.

For Pat Sheehan, the very private role of simply continuing to be Casey’s father has been enough — until recently, that is. In a blip of publicity, Cindy Sheehan bowed out of her diminishing limelight, announcing that she would stop her activism against the Iraq war. In doing so, she declared that Casey Sheehan “did indeed die for nothing.”

That statement ended Pat Sheehan’s silence.

Casey Sheehan...an American Hero

He called me after reading a column in which I disputed his ex-wife’s assertion. Yes, he told me, Casey Sheehan’s death mattered. We continued talking and e-mailing, and he made me realize what should have been so obvious — that a soldier’s life is what is significant, not his death or the activism it might inspire.

One problematic aspect of Cindy Sheehan’s celebrity has been that her deceased son got lost in the news coverage. Nobody knows much about how Casey Sheehan lived or how he died.

Sanchez hits the nail right on the head. As she points out, Casey Sheehan was a selfless hero with a steadfast faith...something that got lost as his mother Cindy was on her rock star tour:

Pat Sheehan is pained that people know so little about the religious devotion of his son. Casey Sheehan so loved his Catholic faith that he considered the priesthood, before realizing how much he wanted to have children. As a child, he would pull a nightstand from against the wall, cover it with a blanket and “play” Mass, enlisting his sister to be a nun.

As a teen, he earned the rank of Eagle Scout. Later he would say that the military was “kind of like Boy Scouts, but with guns.” Casey Sheehan signed up before the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks. His service had nothing to do with revenge, his father says.

Rather, it was a way to practice his faith. Casey Sheehan wanted to be a chaplain’s assistant. Faced with a wait to become one, he chose to be a wheel mechanic instead. As a soldier, he was always the first to greet a visiting priest. If no priest came to say Mass, he would lead a prayer.

Pat Sheehan has only recently learned the details of his son’s death from Martha Raddatz, author of The Long Road Home, a book about the Sadr City uprising.

Sadr City, Iraq. April 4, 2004. A platoon of soldiers was ambushed by sniper fire, trapped in an alley when their Humvees broke down. Army Spc. Casey Sheehan was among the men who volunteered for the rescue of the dead.

Actually, he pulled rank, taking the place of a private.The convoy was fighting its way through more sniper fire when a high-velocity bullet pierced Casey Sheehan’s Kevlar helmet and ricocheted against his head. He was put on a helicopter; doctors desperately tried to save his life. A rosary was in his pocket.

Casey Sheehan was one of eight soldiers who died that day.

Pat Sheehan does not agree with the war that took his son's life. But instead of using his son's death as a platform to protest the war, he took a more dignified approach and is choosing to honor Casey's life. And despite the painful divorce, he refrains from taking a swipe at Cindy:

Pat Sheehan disagrees with his ex-wife’s tactics, but he does not wish to be pitted against her. Philosophically, they are close on their views on the war. “But I would rather that Casey be viewed with dignity,” he told me.

In an e-mail, Pat Sheehan wrote: “I haven’t quite found my voice yet as Casey’s father, but make no mistake, I feel much of the same pain and sense of loss that his Mother does. I have chosen to deal with it in my own way. For all of my children, Casey, Carly, Andy and Jane, I am attempting to move forward with a little grace and dignity. They deserve nothing less.”

B. Hussein Obama brings Christians together...(updated...bumped)

...by accusing evangelicals of divisiveness:

HARTFORD, Conn. (AP) - Sen. Barack Obama told a church convention Saturday that some right- wing evangelical leaders have exploited and politicized religious beliefs in an effort to sow division.

"Somehow, somewhere along the way, faith stopped being used to bring us together and started being used to drive us apart. It got hijacked," the Democratic presidential candidate said in remarks prepared for delivery before the national meeting of the United Church of Christ.

"Part of it's because of the so-called leaders of the Christian Right, who've been all too eager to exploit what divides us," the Illinois senator said.

Obama then went on to give specific examples and call out by name those false teachers who have misled the flock.

Wait. No he didn't.

B. Hussein Obama believes in the separation of church and state...except of course when he's trolling for votes (see sign on balcony)

"At every opportunity, they've told evangelical Christians that Democrats disrespect their values and dislike their church, while suggesting to the rest of the country that religious Americans care only about issues like abortion and gay marriage, school prayer and intelligent design," according to an advance copy of his speech.

You know, because us evangelical Christians are too stupid to realize that abortion and gay marriage goes against what the Bible teaches us. And those are values of the Democratic party (and of B. Hussein Obama). But we didn't realize it. Those evil evangelical pastors have to keep reminding us.

"There was even a time when the Christian Coalition determined that its number one legislative priority was tax cuts for the rich," Obama said. "I don't know what Bible they're reading, but it doesn't jibe with my version."

...Obama declared, and then he turned to his version to begin to quote scripture.



Wait. No he didn't.



Now who is really being divisive? The Christian Coalition has NEVER determined that "tax cuts for the rich was its "number one" priority, but B. Hussein doesn't need the truth to set us free.



Well at least B. Hussein Obama then went on to suggest ways to bridge the gap between evangelicals and more liberal church denominations like the United Church of Christ that support abortion and gay marriage.



Wait. No he didn't.

Update: Ann Coulter was on Hannity and Colmes last night to discuss B. Hussein's comments and as usual, Alan was her little whipping boy:

Yes...the clip is ripped from "Newshounds" who ask the question: How much blacker can a pot get than Coulter?

Of course those morons don't understand that Coulter is a satirist...B. Hussein is running for President.

Ann's two best lines:

I do think anyone named "B. Hussein Obama" should avoid using the words "hijack" and "religion" in the same sentence.

Response to "as children of God, we believe in the worth and dignity of every human being": We actually do believe it which is why we don't think you should be puncturing the skulls of fetuses and sucking the brains out.

Exit question: Does anyone have a more fake smile than Laura Schwartz?

USA! USA!

OK...I hate soccer. But I love Mexican soccer announcers:



Link: sevenload.com

This match was in Chicago. So I am guessing that all of those fans rooting for El Tri made the trip up from Mexico, right?

Because we all know that the immigrants from Mexico want to be good Americans and assimilate into our culture.

Hot Air was first...

Michelle calls out Rosie, Amnesty International USA on real civil rights abuses

This morning Michelle Malkin challenges the bleeding hearts, who are so critical of America's alleged abuse of civil rights, to take on the cause of some people who really need help:

Today I am joining blogs Gateway Pundit, Ali Eteraz, and Iran Focus in reprinting the latest batch of Iranian repression photos being distributed by the regime’s state-run FARS News agency and ISNA. The innocent young men in the photos were beaten, humiliated, and arrested for wearing Western clothing and hairstyles. It is in the public interest to spread these photos far and wide. The images should be seared onto the global conscience:

Question: Will these photos be blared across the front pages of the international media with as much disgust and condemnation as the photos of Abu Ghraib or the manufactured Gitmo Koran-flushing riots?

Answer: Fat chance.

Question: What do leftist apologists for the Iranian regime have to say about the brutal, appalling, and escalating crackdown on human rights? Yeah, you, Rosie.

Answer: Nothing.

Of course Amnesty International takes the lead in decrying these horrible abuses, right?

So what does Amnesty International USA have to say about the Iranian human rights debacle on its homepage today? Nothing. Instead, the site promotes two campaigns for Darfur and a lead story about the campaign to secure habeas corpus rights for terror suspects at Guantanamo Bay:

A challenge to Rosie and Amnesty International USA members and America’s progressive left (I know there are a few on the story, but they are far between): How about taking a day off from Bush-bashing and America-blaming to raise your voices against the mullahcracy’s brutal human rights abuses?

Or how about embedding these videos so that the cries of Iranian women and girls don’t go unheard:

Michelle has more photos and videos...make sure you go there to view.

Dirtbag track coach preys on teenager...then marries her

Before I get rolling on this, it's time for some full disclosure. I coach basketball...high school girls basketball. For a number of reasons every time I see a story like this I get really pissed off:

The Hagers are trying to figure out how life went off track for their teenage daughter, Windy.


They envisioned that life for the good student and promising athlete would be filled with dreams of the prom and college, but that all changed this week when Windy, 16, married her high school track coach.


At South Brunswick High School in North Carolina, Windy's greatest passion was track and field. But that passion led her down a troubling path.


During Windy's freshman year, her 38-year-old track coach, Brenton Wuchae, began taking a more active interest in her, offering to give the 14-year-old rides home from practice.

Windy with her new predator husband

The first warning to parents: A coach should never offer to give your kid a ride home. Certainly never by themselves...no matter how "trustworthy" the coach is. I do my best to arrange rides with other parents or students for my players...and in the occasions when I need to give kids rides, there are always at least two of them in my car at all times.

Adult coaches need to hold themselves completely above reproach at all times...especially in a high school setting. High school kids talk. A female athlete is seen leaving campus alone with a coach...and kids will spread rumors. It's just not smart.

"He just seemed like a genuine guy, like he was there for the kids," said Windy's father, Dennis Hager.But the Hagers eventually grew uneasy. Their phone bills showed text messages between Wuchae and Windy as late as 2 a.m.

OK, there's your next clue. Except for my team captains (who are in charge of reaching the other kids for confirmation of practice times, etc.) I don't have my players' phone numbers in my phone. If I need to reach them, I try to call the parents...or I send email's with the parents cc'd on everything. I also don't take IM's from my players...ever.

The 2 a.m. text-messages should have been enough for the school to instantly fire Wuchae and begin a criminal investigation. But the school passed the buck:

The Hagers confronted Wuchae. "He assured me there was nothing like that going on, [and that] they were just friends. His intentions were purely appropriate," Dennis said.


Not satisfied with that answer, the Hagers turned to the school district, which spoke to the coach.


The principal of the high school wrote to the Hagers, "I have seen nothing but a cooperative attitude from the teacher, and to the best of my knowledge, he has not had any contact with Windy since then."

What a load of crap. You have a coach contacting a player at 2am! That right there is all you need to know something completely inappropriate is occurring. But the school district did nothing.

One more thing. I make sure my players understand this from DAY ONE: I am their coach. Not their father-figure, big brother or friend. I am 42 years old...if I ever described a relationship with a player as a "friendship", that should instantly disqualify me from a position of authority (teacher, coach, pastor etc.) with teenagers.

The Hagers contacted police; they even tried to get a restraining order.


"We've tried everybody. We've been to the law. We've been to the school board," Betty said. "Our family has come and tried to talk to her. We've had people on the phone with her for hours — family, friends. We've been to our pastor asking for guidance. We've been to his pastor."


Meanwhile, the Hagers say Windy withdrew, refusing to speak to them until she asked them to sign a consent form so that she and her coach — a man more than twice her age — could get married.


Although anguished, her weary parents gave in.


Monday, Windy and Wuchae married, and he resigned from the school.

This is a clear case of a sick adult preying on kids. Maybe he thinks he is in love with this girl, but I guarantee you that Wuchae was calculating in his manipulation of Windy. 14-16 year olds are highly impressionable and I sure Windy was both flattered and overwhelmed by the attention he gave her.



This girl has had her youth stolen from her. Unfortunately she won't realize that until a few years have passed and she realizes that she married a man who took advantage of her youth. And since Wuchae certainly appears to have a proclivity for preying on teenagers, it shouldn't surprise anyone if he ends up repeating this behavior.


I don't mean to frighten or discourage parents of kids involved in sports, but this stuff happens all the time. Certainly 99% of all youth coaches are involved for all the right reasons, but unfortunately this type of indiscretion occurs much more than is reported in the media.

The following is a story reprinted from the San Diego Union-Tribune (no link because it is archived from 2001 and you need a password to access it), involving a local girls basketball coach who took one of his players to Mexico for 10 days:

EL CAJON -- The West Hills High School girl who ran away to Mexico with a volunteer basketball coach last fall has filed suit against the coach and Grossmont Unified High School District.


The suit by student Chelsea Olayan and her mother, Anita Miller, contends that the district was negligent because it failed to supervise the coach, Jeffrey Gagne.


In September, Gagne, a 43-year-old married father of two, fled to Mexico with Olayan, then 16. They were missing for six days before returning to the United States, where Gagne was arrested at the San Ysidro international border crossing.


He was sentenced in December to nine months in jail after pleading no contest to one count of child abduction and one count of sexual contact with a minor. Although a no-contest plea technically does not admit guilt, it is recorded as a criminal conviction.


The lawsuit, filed Monday in El Cajon Superior Court, contends that school officials were on notice about Gagne's "sexual misconduct and inappropriate sexual behavior" with female athletes. The suit said the district received complaints about Gagne in 1998 from a student and her mother.


The suit also says that, in 1999, two West Hills basketball coaches learned from several parents that their children felt uncomfortable around Gagne because his behavior at times was inappropriate and "too intimate."


The suit does not specify the amount of money damages sought. In December, however, the school board rejected a claim -- a precursor to a lawsuit -- from Miller that sought $1 million in damages.


The superintendent of the Grossmont Union High School District reacted with dismay to the lawsuit.


"This case is really a matter that involves individual responsibility," said Superintendent Granger Ward. "The conduct of Mr. Gagne was inappropriate. He admitted to his guilt and served time as a result.


"It is unfair to attempt to shift the blame to the district for this criminal misconduct by Mr. Gagne. Unfortunately, this case appears to be a matter of attempting to go after deep pockets."

While it might be true that Olayan and Miller might have been trying to make a little coin off the school district, the lesson for parents is this: Don't rely on a school district to take accountability. Coaches generally are required to go through the FBI background check and get fingerprinted, but parents should still watch out for the signs that were so evident in the Windy Hager case. Be diligent and insist on this from coaches who instruct your kids:

1. No one-on-one interaction with players away from the field or court of play. Any talks with players can be done in front of parents, other coaches, or team captains.

2. Set and adhere to guidelines for contacting players outside of games or practice. No late night private phone calls or emails.

3. Be aware of coaches who buy players gifts or write personal "encouraging" notes. I once knew a youth baseball coach who bought one of his kids a poster of his favorite major league player. Four months later, that coach was arrested for molesting that kid. Which leads me to my next point:

4. Don't assume that just because the coach is the same gender as your kid or is married, that you can relax your standards.

1001 Uses for the Koran

If Salman Rushdie gets a fatwa for writing a crappy and boring book Muslims fly into a murderous rage over, what will Misha at the Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler get for this?

Don't click on this link. Just don't. I'm warning you.

(An aside: Can I get a fatwa for reprinting Misha's work? Please?!)

Bird Rock Bandit Cravens a "good kid" with clueless parents

Update June 28, 2008 here
Yeah...maybe this is gonna be a little unfair. I know that Seth Craven's parents are in anguish right now over the fact that their kid probably helped murder Emery Kauanui. But how often do you hear parents admit that they did a crappy job raising their little thug?


Of course it didn't happen in this case either:

SAN DIEGO – The parents of Seth Cravens, one of four young La Jolla men accused of murdering professional surfer Emery Kauanui, portray their son as a “good person with a good heart,” but also a young man who was aggressive and lacked direction.

Making their first public comments since Kauanui's Memorial Day weekend beating death, William and Karen Cravens said they knew nothing about victims' statements and police reports accusing their 21-year-old son of being the assailant in a string of unprovoked beatings over the past five years.

“I'm not aware of any of that,” William Cravens, 65, said during a news conference at the office of their son's attorneys, where they were flanked by three of their 14 grown children and eight of their 52 grandchildren.

Well at least give Mr. Cravens credit for being a stud. 14 kids! Of course Mrs. Cravens deserves some credit too:

The Cravens insisted their son was innocent of murder in an incident that witnesses said began as a fair fight between Kauanui and one of the four accused, but ended in a fatal, four-on-one beating.

“He did not do what he is accused of doing,” said Karen Cravens. “There is no doubt in my mind or in my husband's.”

Please. Isn't there at least a little doubt?

Cravens is named as a suspect by San Diego police in two cases: a February battery of a man outside of a La Jolla Boulevard taco shop and a 2004 incident in which Cravens is accused of threatening a man with “great bodily harm.”

Several other victims have told police Cravens beat them up without provocation at parties, outside of bars, and on the street, officials have said.

Police have said they are looking into at least 15 assaults connected to the Bird Rock Bandits, several of which surfaced after publicity over Kauanui killing.

“We're not aware of any police reports,” William Cravens said. He added that he and his wife did not know their son had been banned from The Shack, a La Jolla Boulevard bar, for picking fights with strangers, as a bartender there reported.

You'd think Seth's lawyer might have clued the parents in by now...but of course, he's a lawyer:

Alan Spears, an attorney for Cravens, said his client's bond was excessive and that Cravens should not be charged with murder.

Though the defendants boasted on the Internet of being part of a “crew” calling themselves the Bird Rock Bandits, Spears scoffed at that idea.

“This notion that Mr. Cravens and the others are part of this gang is absolutely preposterous,” the lawyer said.

Uh....right. Except that Spears apparently forgets that "Mr. Cravens and the others" were bragging about their thuggish exploits on the Bird Rock Bandit's My Space page. I guess being part of gang is pretty cool until you kill someone.

Good kid...non-gang member Seth Cravens flashes gang signs with the man he helped murder (allegedly)

But still...Seth Cravens is a good kid who enjoys reading and calling his mom:

William and Karen Cravens characterized Seth as a loving, caring son, brother and uncle, who calls every night from jail and e-mails them daily.

“Overall, he is doing good,” his mother said. “There are good days and bad days. He loves to read and he has gotten a lot of reading done.”

To be fair, it's possible that Mr. and Mrs. Cravens have a good reason for not accepting responsibility for the values instilled in Seth...you know, "getting wasted, partying, surfing and womping":

The elder Cravens was convicted himself in the mid-1990s on a federal charge involving a $74-million fraud while he was head of the Polynesian Cultural Center in Honolulu. He served three years of supervised probation after testifying on the government's behalf.

The Cravens, who have been married 46 years, said that while they knew their son to have an aggressive nature since he was a child, they were never contacted by teachers or counselors about his behavior and do not believe their son has an anger problem.

William Cravens conceded Seth had “done a little too much partying in his young life.” He added that his son “likes to mix it up.” His wife said Seth was not one to pick a fight, but “he maybe doesn't walk away from them.”

Nice kid you raised there. A "good" kid with aggressive tendencies who likes to read and call his mom, party, get into fights and does not have an anger problem. Oh yeah...and who is in jail for murder.

Nobody told me there'd be dreams like these...

Strange dreams indeed:

Last night I dreamed that I was playing basketball and New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson was on my team.

Instead of a ball, we were using a stapler.

Every time I passed Richardson the ball/stapler, he dropped it. After a few possessions, he was begging me not to pass the ball/stapler to him again.

The ball/stapler didn't dribble very well.

Most peculiar, mama...

Quick Post before I hit the I-5...

Doing the SD-LA shuttle today...so a quick post:

From Say Anything.

3%?

I think that says it all.

Out.

Matthews caught speaking truth to Moonbats

Chrissy Matthews tells his moonbat viewers what we already know about MSNBC:

Dilbert takes aim at "greens"

I don't think Scott Adams will be invited to an Al Gore symposium on Global Warming in the near future:

Click each strip to make bigger

I'm thinking this is going to be a theme this week in Dilbert. I have a link under "funnies" on the right hand side of the page if you want to follow along...

How in the heck...

...are the Chinese able to do this, when we can't get a border fence put up?

China plans to build a highway on the side of Mount Everest to ease the Olympic torch's journey to the peak of the world's tallest mountain before the 2008 Beijing Games, state media reported yesterday.

Construction of the road, budgeted at $19.7 million, would turn a 67-mile rough path from the foot of the mountain to a base camp at 17,060 feet "into a blacktop highway fenced by undulating guardrails," the official New China News Agency said.

The agency said construction, which would start next week, would take about four months. The highway would become a major route for tourists and mountaineers, it said.

That's 67 miles of paved road at 17,000 foot elevation in four months. Maybe we should outsource the contract for our border fence to the Chinese. Because when it comes to border security, it certainly looks like they know what the hell they're doing:

If I were King of the World...

New edicts if I were the King of the World:

1. No laugh tracks allowed. Ever. I won't watch any CBS "comedy" because they all have those retarded laugh tracks. That 1/2 Hour News Hour trainwreck on Fox News? Can't sit through four minutes of it before the laugh track makes me want to launch a brick through my screen. Besides...with the exception of Dennis Miller, that show sucks. Which leads me to my next edict...

2. Fox News will stick to news and news analysis. No attempts to be funny. Geraldo is banished to the "E" Channel where he can fawn over Paris Hilton all he wants and present his retarded argument for amnesty to the brainiacs who watch that channel...and couldn't care less. Dennis Miller gets his own hour instead.

Dennis Miller addresses the Global Warming Angst Squad

Dennis Miller's segment on the otherwise-lame 1/2 Hour News Hour:



Memo to Fox News: Give Miller his own 1/2 Hour News Hour and get rid of the other dorks. And lose the moronic sound track. Miller doesn't need it.

A message from John Edwards...

"Just a reminder y'all...there is no global war on terror. But there are two Americas..."

Prayer back in public schools!

Of course the Bible and the 10 Commandments are still banned. Oh...and no praying to Jehovah!

OAKLAND, Calif., June 12 — The lesson began with the striking of a Tibetan singing bowl to induce mindful awareness.

With the sound of their new school bell, the fifth graders at Piedmont Avenue Elementary School here closed their eyes and focused on their breathing, as they tried to imagine “loving kindness” on the playground.

Wait. That sounds like prayer to me. Or maybe it's brainwashing:

This is what is known as mindfulness training, in which stress-reducing techniques drawn from Buddhist meditation are wedged between reading and spelling tests.

Students fold their hands and close their eyes in prayer mindfulness brainwashing training

During a five-week pilot program at Piedmont Avenue Elementary, Miss Megan, the “mindful” coach, visited every classroom twice a week, leading 15 minute sessions on how to have “gentle breaths and still bodies.” The sound of the Tibetan bowl reverberated at the start and finish of each lesson.

Now let me get this straight. Public schools can brainwash kids with Buddhist incantations, but have a Christian prayer at a football game and the ACLU comes marching in?

I don't have kids. If I ever do, there is NO WAY they are going to public school.

Monday Morning Boingo

It's Monday and I'm unmotivated. I need a pick-me-up:

Gee...I'll bet their football team sucks

...since tackling and physical contact are kinda important, ya know.


And you can rule out such dangerous events as the drama department's production of Oklahoma.

Because at Kilmer Middle School, you keep your hands to yourself:

Fairfax County (VA) middle school student Hal Beaulieu hopped up from his lunch table one day a few months ago, sat next to his girlfriend and slipped his arm around her shoulder. That landed him a trip to the school office.

Among his crimes: hugging.

All touching -- not only fighting or inappropriate touching -- is against the rules at Kilmer Middle School in Vienna. Hand-holding, handshakes and high-fives? Banned. The rule has been conveyed to students this way: "NO PHYSICAL CONTACT!!!!!"

Just say "No" to Oklahoma!

Of course once you allow "high-fiving", it's just such a slippery slope:

Deborah Hernandez, Kilmer's principal, said the rule makes sense in a school that was built for 850 students but houses 1,100. She said that students should have their personal space protected and that many lack the maturity to understand what is acceptable or welcome.

"You get into shades of gray," Hernandez said. "The kids say, 'If he can high-five, then I can do this.' "

Typically, she said, only repeat offenders or those breaking other rules are reprimanded. "You have to have an absolute rule with students, and wiggle room and good judgment on behalf of the staff," Hernandez said.

I'm guessing Ms. Hernandez won't be applying for a position with the Boulder, Colorado school district anytime soon.

Slum sweet slum...

A Moonbattery two-fer...

Turns out Nobel-prize winning carpenter Jimmuh Carter isn't so handy with a hammer and nails:

Mary Zeigler was the proud owner of a low-cost home in Jacksonville's Fairway Oaks development, built by volunteers who included Jimmy the Dhimmi himself, as well as wife Rosalynn. She still owns the home, but she's no longer so proud:

"I've got a 25-year mortgage, and I've got stuff that needs to be addressed or I'm just paying my mortgage in vain, because I won't have a house in 25 years because it will be falling apart."

She's not the only Fairway Oaks resident with problems. Of 56 who answered a survey, 41 reported cracked foundations, 22 reported cracked walls, and 48 complained that their houses were infested with insects and/or rodents, a common problem in houses with holes in them.

OK...not Jimmuh's actual work, but you get the idea...

What about THIS, Geraldo?

Van Helsing at Moonbattery has the heartbreaking story of 10-year old Alejandra Gutierrez who was raped and murdered by an illegal alien.

Geraldo Rivera likes to trumpet that illegal aliens are less likely to commit crimes than American citizens.

I wonder how Alejandra's parents feel about that.

Breaking News! Bush amends border security/amnesty bill

Scrappleface has the latest update on the changes President Bush has made to the illegal alien amnesty immigration reform bill :

(2007-06-15) — President George Bush, in an effort to address conservatives’ dual concerns about border security and the rule of law, today said the revived immigration reform bill would finish the U.S.-Mexico border fence by fining illegal aliens to pay for it and requiring each one to build a section of the fence with his own hands.

With the U.S.-Mexico border stretching more than 1,951 miles, and estimates that 20 million illegal aliens already inhabit the United States, President Bush said the measure would require each “currently undocumented future citizen” to build about six inches of fencing.

Congressman Duncan Hunter is said to be on board with the President:

“as long as the illegal aliens building the fence face north when they do it, and head south when they’re done.”

If I were the king of the world

I am watching the US Open golf tournament and I think I've finally had it.

So begins a series that I shall call "If I were the king of the world" (with apologies to 3 Dog Night).

My first edict:

Any moron who yells either "You da Man!" or "Get in the hole!" at a televised PGA golf tournament, shall be forcibly ejected and sentenced to serving drinks to boozed up lesbians during the Dinah Shore weekend in Palm Springs.

My "progressive" alma mater is guilty of segregation

Before I get into this, let me say...I love UCLA. I love the education it provided me, I love the life experiences I had there, and of course I love those 11 National Championship banners hanging at Pauley Pavillion.

But one thing that bothered me was the constant indoctrination into ethnic, gender and sexual "sensitivity" that reigned (and continues to reign) on that campus.

During my orientation weekend, one of the first things I was told was that 10% of the student population was gay. From then on, I looked around each class I took and tried to figure out which 10% were gay...for example if my class had 30 students, three of the students HAD to be gay because that was what I was told.

The morning of my very first class at UCLA (business calculus) the teacher was late. His last name was "Chang". The kid sitting next to me mused (very innocently) "I think I saw him in the halls, is he Oriental?"

To which an angry co-ed behind us responded, "Don't say that! The proper term is Asian. What you said is offensive!"

Welcome to UCLA.

During my time there, a fraternity lost its charter because of a Cinco-de-Mayo party. Not an out-of-control party where anyone was physically assaulted or underage students were found consuming alcohol (although I'm sure some were...c'mon, it was a frat party).

No, the fraternity was shut down for two years because of a tequila worm on a party advertisement that was an "insensitive" depiction of Hispanics. Of course the dozen or so Hispanics who were IN the fraternity didn't seem to mind, but a bunch of Mechistas marched and then threatened to march again. That was all it took to shut the frat down for two years.

My alma mater prides itself on its diversity and its sensitivity to every special group that might be on campus. But this has gotten ridiculous:

Commencement weekend is hard to plan at the University of California, Los Angeles. The university now has so many separate identity-group graduations that scheduling them not to conflict with one another is a challenge. The women’s studies graduation and the Chicana/Chicano studies graduation are both set for 10 AM Saturday. The broader Hispanic graduation, “Raza,” is in near-conflict with the black graduation, which starts just an hour later.

Planning was easier before a new crop of ethnic groups pushed for inclusion. Students of Asian heritage were once content with the Asian–Pacific Islanders ceremony. But now there are separate Filipino and Vietnamese commencements, and some talk of a Cambodian one in the future. Years ago, UCLA sponsored an Iranian graduation, but the school’s commencement office couldn’t tell me if the event was still around. The entire Middle East may yet be a fertile source for UCLA commencements.

All these commencements are sponsored by UCLA and paid for by California tax dollars. A waste of money? You bet, but you'd better not try to deny any of these groups their own special ceremony...the ACLU will come calling.

Of course the ACLU would also come calling if white/male/protestant/straight students wanted their own commencement.

The funny thing is, the graduates who belong to these groups don't even show up for these ceremonies:

Not all ethnic and racial graduations are well attended. The 2003 figures at UCLA showed that while 300 of 855 Hispanic students attended, only 170 out of 1,874 Asian-Americans did.

But it's all part of the indoctrination UCLA students receive. See...we can't just proudly identify ourselves as Bruins:

Some students are presumably eligible for four or five graduations. A gay student with a Native American father and a Filipino mother could attend the Asian, Filipino, and American Indian ceremonies, plus the mainstream graduation and the Lavender Graduation for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered students.

Graduates usually wear identity-group markers—a Filipino stole or a Vietnamese sash, for instance, or a rainbow tassel at the Lavender event. Promoters of ethnic and racial graduations often talk about the strong sense of community that they favor. But it is a sense of community based on blood, a dubious and historically dangerous organizing principle.

And just as it did when I started at UCLA in '89, the indoctrination begins that very first orientation weekend:

But the core reason for separatist graduations is the obvious one: on campus, assimilation is a hostile force, the domestic version of American imperialism. On many campuses, identity-group training begins with separate freshman orientation programs for nonwhites, who arrive earlier and are encouraged to bond before the first Caucasian freshmen arrive. Some schools have separate orientations for gays as well. Administrations tend to foster separatism by arguing that bias is everywhere, justifying double standards that favor identity groups.

Would I send my kid to UCLA now? Well...you bet your ass I would. But I'd make sure that kid was insulated against the new separatism and prepared to defend against its idiocy.

The Turds on Capitol Hill (updated)

Most of us can agree that something stinks up on Capitol Hill. Approval of the job Congress is doing is at a 10-year low, and it looks like someone has left them a personal message:

According to a Capitol Hill newspaper, police are unable to solve the mystery of the "caca caper."

"Usually, if a turd gets into the Senate, it’s because he or she was elected," Emily Heil reports for Roll Call. "But on Wednesday, several large piles of actual, nonmetaphorical 'No. 2' found their way into the Capitol, and the source isn’t yet clear."

Heil continues, "On Wednesday afternoon, Capitol Police cordoned off a section of the hallway on the third floor of the Senate side of the Capitol, where at least three piles of the stuff were causing a stench — and a stir.

At first, the word circulating among the staff was that a visiting child had fallen ill while in the gallery. But then the prevailing theory was that the foul stuff had come from an adult or group of adults making a yet-to-be-determined political statement."

According to the paper, "Reports also circulated that the yucky stuff had been smeared on seats in the gallery overlooking the chamber floor, and the gallery remained closed hours after the incident was first noted."

I don't know quite what is happening with the sudden explosion of turd-related news. Of course we can be assured that we will have a stink emmanating from Washington as long as this fool has a job:

(Update): Alas, as David Limbaugh points out, the stench from atop the Hill won't be dissipating any time soon:

Professional poll-watcher and persistent president-slanderer Harry Reid, who also moonlights as Senate Majority Leader, is proving himself to be a menace and a brutish boor.

Reid joined House Speaker and fellow president-slanderer Nancy Pelosi in sending a letter to President Bush berating him for not listening to the will of the American people on Iraq. If Reid were truly interested in deferring to the will of the American people, he would tender his resignation today -- not to mention get off the amnesty bandwagon.

Luckily for Reid, we have a republic, not a pure democracy with ongoing votes of confidence, so his job will be secure until the next election, despite his well-earned 19 percent approval rating and 45 percent disapproval rating, according to Rasmussen Reports.

Join the celebration!

Preston over at 6MB is hosting a celebration of something or other that began yesterday. As usual he's a little confused...but go on over and join the party.

Commenter Yiddish Steel had this contribution to the celebration. Which inspired me to add this:



To me...one of the greatest moments in Rock history.

Will somebody PLEASE put a muzzle on this moron? (UPDATE)

Maybe this idiot can get a job with Al-Jazeera when his term is up.

I wonder how our men and women in the military feel whenever this weasel opens his mouth...

UPDATE: Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. But remember...Harry Reid supports our troops. Don't question his patriotism or his integrity.

Bill at INDC Journal analyzes Harry's latest bout with verbal diarrhea.

Da Governator speaks truth to "immigrants" (Update-Video added)

Uh oh. You just know the $#!&storm that is about to occur now that our governor has said this:

"You've got to turn off the Spanish television set," Schwarzenegger said at the 25th annual National Association of Hispanic Journalists convention, which included many who produce Spanish-language material.

"It's that simple. You've got to learn English," he said. "I know this sounds odd and this is the politically incorrect thing to say and I'm going to get myself in trouble. But I know that when I came to this country, I very rarely spoke German to anyone."

The Republican governor, an Austrian immigrant, was responding to a question about how to improve Latino academic performance.

Here's the thing. HE'S RIGHT! Instead of accusing Arnold of being insensitive to immigrants, they should look to him as the example of how immigrants can succeed if they assimilate to our culture, instead of staying immersed in theirs.

But of course, there was whining to be done:

Schwarzenegger last year angered some Latino leaders by observing that Mexican immigrants have problems succeeding in the United States because "they try to stay Mexican." He hammered at the same point Wednesday in San Jose, saying that immigrants from Germany or France have an easier time learning English because they do not have many outlets to speak their native tongues.

"You're just forced to speak English, and that just makes you learn the language faster," Schwarzenegger said. "It is much more difficult and much more challenging when you are ... let's say, Latino. Because you have so many Latinos, as I see at the Capitol in Sacramento, there are so many Latinos who speak Spanish all the time, they speak to each other in Spanish. So it makes it difficult to perfect their English skills as quickly as possible."

"They're busy working," remarked panelist Pilar Marrero, political editor of Spanish-language newspaper La Opinión. "They don't have time to."

Marrero seemed to grow visibly tense as Schwarzenegger made his case against Spanish-language media, and the governor apologized at one point after he said not to read Spanish-language newspapers.

"Spanish media is there to do what the English media doesn't do, which is to serve the immigrants," Marrero said afterward.

Sara Shakir, managing news producer of Radio Bilingue Inc., a national Latino public radio network based in Fresno, was among those who couldn't believe he would say that, given the audience.

"Here he was, sitting in front of hundreds of journalists whose job it is to create information for people in the language they understand, and reflects their diversity and cultural heritage," she said, "and saying, 'Let's obliterate all that.' "

Cecilia Alvear, a former TV news producer, was only half kidding when she said, "What? And give up my telenovelas?" referring to Spanish-language soap operas. "His message seems to be, 'Let's be monolingual,' " Alvear said.

YES! That's it! What would be wrong with everyone in the UNITED STATES being able to speak English!?!

That doesn't mean poor Ms. Alvear would have to "give up her telenovelas" or stop watching Sabado Gigante!. She already hablas inglais. It's all those other "immigrants" (I am refraining from using the term "aliens" because I wouldn't want to make Geraldo Rivera cry again) who haven't learned to speak English yet who should try language immersion.

It would seem normal that if I were to go live in another country that one of the first things I would do is begin to learn their language. My life would be easier. But the "immigration" community expects us to assimilate to them.

Update...here's the video:

Michelle makes Geraldo cry...(updated)

Well...almost.

Hot Air of course has the video up first. Watch for the smoke coming out of Michelle's ears while she listens to Geraldo's inanity. Then notice the deer in the headlight look on Geraldo when Michelle goes into attack mode.

I'll have the video up here when it is available.

Update: It took a while, but here it is:

Hey Bush! Another reason you can take your amnesty bill and shove it!

Ann Coulter reminds us that George Bush cares more about illegal alien drug smugglers than the hard-working men and women who are doing their best to protect our borders:

Agent Ignacio Ramos and wife before he was thrown in jail and beaten

Ignacio Ramos and Jose Alonso Compean are normally the sort of Mexican-Americans Bush would tear up at while promoting amnesty for illegal aliens. Both served in the military and are taxpaying, law-abiding citizens. They've been risking their lives as Border Patrol agents for years.

Agent Compean back when BP agents were supposed to catch drug smugglers

Ramos was nominated for Border Patrol Agent of the Year in 2005. His nomination received a major setback when the Bush administration decided to put him in prison instead. Ramos and Compean are now serving more than 10 years apiece in solitary confinement for chasing a drug-running illegal alien back to Mexico.


Bush's pal, U.S. Attorney Johnny Sutton, gave immunity to a Mexican drug dealer hauling a million dollars worth of drugs across the border so that the drug dealer could testify against two Border Patrol agents who shot him in the buttocks.

Dirtbag drug dealer and Johnny Sutton pal Osbaldo Aldrete-Davila

The border patrol agents were presumed guilty of an unlawful shooting because they neglected to fill out the proper paperwork. For busting a cap in the butt of a drug courier crossing the border illegally — who was so mortally wounded that he proceeded to scamper back to Mexico — they were supposed to spend five hours filling out paperwork. This is what the Bush administration means when it talks about a "cover-up." As U.S. prosecutor Debra Kanof said, "You have to report any discharge of a firearm."

Intriguingly, Kanof also says: "The Border Patrol pursuit policy prohibits the pursuit of someone." (Hence, the oft-heard warning of the border agent in hot pursuit, "Stop or I'll ... do absolutely nothing!")

But wait — that's not all! The Border Patrol agents also exceeded the speed limit. "In order to exceed the speed limit," Kanof said, "you have to get supervisor approval, and they did not." It's just so hard to fill out a written request to exceed the speed limit when you're off-roading at 65 mph. There's a whispering campaign suggesting that Ramos and Compean failed to use their turn signal.

As I understand it, you're also supposed to not cross the border illegally from Mexico with a van full of drugs. But the Bush administration has no interest in enforcing those laws. Ninety-eight percent of illegal aliens captured crossing the border illegally are not prosecuted. Those drugs are doing the job American drugs just won't do!

The Bush administration pulls out the big guns only for serious violations like a Border Patrol officer not filling out paperwork.

In addition to giving the illegal alien drug smuggler full immunity to testify against U.S. Border Patrol agents, the government gave him taxpayer-funded medical care for his buttocks wound, an unconditional border-crossing card, the right to sue the U.S. for "civil rights" violations, and a GAP gift card. The drug runner is also on the short-list to replace Attorney General Alberto Gonzales.

He's now suing the U.S. for $5 million, but the Bush administration is hoping to bargain him down to $10 million.

That border-crossing card came in handy when the winged illegal alien brought in another load of drugs a short eight months later — for which he has still not been charged, nearly two years later. Who does he think he is? Rep. William Jefferson?

Johnny Sutton...friend to Mexican drug-runners

Bush's pal Sutton keeps defending his decision to prosecute Border Patrol agents for paperwork violations, rather than an illegal alien for drug trafficking, on the grounds that the drug dealer has not been charged with any crimes. Let's see, whose job is it to charge that Mexican drug runner with a crime? Why, I believe that would be Johnny Sutton!

President Bush...you are supposed to DEFEND our country against drug smugglers, not cut deals with them. If you had any balls at all, you'd pardon Ramos and Compean, fire Sutton, lock up Aldrete-Davila, and then build a wall to keep future drug smugglers OUT of the US. Until you grow a pair:

It is SO on! (Updated/Bumped)

Last night on the O'Reilly Factor, Bill announced that he has arranged a cage match between Michelle Malkin and Geraldo Rivera to brawl over the illegal immigration issue. The pre-fight appetizer:



The battle is on Thursday night's O'Reilly Factor. Michelle is going to kick Geraldo's ass...

Update: Michelle lobs the first grenade:

As you follow the debate over the Bush-Kennedy immigration bill, keep this cardinal rule in mind: 99.99 percent of the lawmakers who promise you that they'll ensure the deportation of anyone who doesn't follow their new "guest-worker" regulations are either A) lying or B) completely clueless.


Rule No. 2: Anyone who plays the Enforcement equals Kicking-Down-Doors-And-Depriving-Babies-of-Mother's-Milk card (yes, that's you, Geraldo Rivera) is either A) lying or B) completely clueless.

Read her entire column.

So this is what happened to me

All this time, I thought I was eating healthy. The menu does say "salad".



Shame on you, Taco Bell...for making me believe that you were a heath food restaurant.

The Scat news you've been waiting for

Uh...no. Sorry.

Headline writers across the country are having a blast with this story:

MARSHALLTOWN, Iowa - Police blame a woman named Butts for stealing toilet paper from a central Iowa courthouse, and while they're chuckling, the theft charge could put her in prison.

"She's facing potentially three years of incarceration for three rolls of toilet paper," Chief Lon Walker said, stifling a laugh as he talked to KCCI-TV about Suzanne Marie Butts. "See, I can't say it with a straight face."

Of course I'll not stoop to the level of those who would make light of this. The attorney for Ms. Butts is hoping to have this wiped clean from her record, but prosecutors say they have a huge pile of evidence against her.

Meanwhile, a London commuter saved the lives of several women by taking matter into his own hands:

A would-be murderer who defecated on trains to "purge" himself of inner voices urging him to kill has been detained indefinitely in a secure mental hospital.

Over several months Bonney Eberendu, 36, ran up a £50,000 damages bill as teams of "specialist cleaners" were forced to withdraw rolling stock from service and spend hours cleaning up after him.

A bus garage worker finally spotted him last October undressing on a double-decker, London's Southwark Crown Court heard.

Peter Zinner, prosecuting, said the defendant went on to explain that on no fewer than five occasions "he had observed women with the intention of doing a frenzied stabbing".

He added: "But he didn't carry out an act of murder because by defecating and smearing his excrement he purged himself of the urge to kill."

Had only Ms. Butts absconded to London with her booty...aw, forget it.

Dennis Miller CRUSHES Harry Reid (updated) BUMPED

Tonight on the 1/2 Hour News Hour on Fox News, Dennis Miller SMOKED Harry Reid. Hot Air has the video up first, I'll follow with an embedded video as soon as one is available.

Michelle Malkin has the best headline.

(Update...as promised)

Has Paris Hilton found God?

Color me skeptical for now:

"I'm not the same person I was," she said. "I used to act dumb. It was an act. I am 26 years old, and that act is no longer cute. It is not who I am, nor do I want to be that person for the young girls who looked up to me. I know now that I can make a difference, that I have the power to do that. I have been thinking that I want to do different things when I am out of here. I have become much more spiritual. God has given me this new chance."

What a difference a weekend in the slam makes...

She has had a person whom she described as a spiritual adviser who said, "My spirit or soul did not like the way I was being seen and that is why I was sent to jail." "God," she said, "has released me."

She is reading newspapers — The LA Times and the Wall Street Journal — and books like "The Secret," "The Power of Now" and the Bible.

Who am I to judge? Look, if Paris Hilton had an epiphanic experience this weekend and embraced God...then Praise the Lord. The witness of her transformation could end up being an amazing example for young girls: "I used to be a vacuous spoiled brat, but look what God did for me..."

Hey...I'll pray for that and for the first time I find myself rooting for Paris. But for now, I'll settle for this:

Her mother had earlier told me that Paris said, "I will never again have a drink and drive."

Baby steps...

A Serious Question

MSNBC interviewed perpetually stoned media expert Tommy Chong about the Paris Hilton non-story. Contessa Brewer must be pissed her career has devolved into interviewing baked "B" movie actors about stupid spoiled whores. Guess which question made me spit coffee all over my keyboard:

Bird Rock Bandits "Surf" Gang...not so much surfers

Update June 28, 2008 here

Yesterday's Union Tribune had an exhaustive recap of the events leading to the death of pro surfer Emery Kauanui. I've touched on a few things, but make sure you read the entire story:

It started with a spilled drink in a crowded bar called the La Jolla Brew House, not far from the bejewelled beaches of Bird Rock and Windansea.

It ended with a professional surfer sprawled in front of his mother's house, bleeding from a fractured skull.

Four days later, Emery Kauanui Jr. was dead and four of his acquaintances, all graduates of La Jolla High School, were in jail, charged with the first homicide in the seaside enclave since 2002.

From left,"Turd "Bird Rock Bandits" Cravens, House, Yanke and Osuna

Surfers are generally mellow people...with one exception. Don't bogart their waves!

Outsiders or novice surfers trying to ride the waves off Windansea or Bird Rock are likely to encounter angry locals who've been known to protect their slice of the ocean with their fists. Author Tom Wolfe portrayed Windansea's youthful locals as arrogant, indulgent and delinquent in his 1966 essay “The Pump House Gang.”

But even before Wolfe's snide portrayal, Windandsea Surf Club symbolized the raucous side of beach culture, with boastful, boozy, bawdy promises made to riders from Bird Rock to Malibu that weren't always taken, or meant, in jest.

But as it turns out, the surf punks who jumped Emery Kauanui weren't surfers at all. They were just, well...punks:

Police and others examining Kauanui's death are pondering whether this traditionally harsh kind of “localism” may have been adopted on shore by certain young La Jolla toughs, who happened to surf relatively little, if at all.

The legal eagles who are defending these thugs are now trying to portray them as upstanding young men:

Meanwhile, letters submitted in court this week on behalf of Cravens, the 13th of 14 siblings, describe him as a young man of boundless humor who is tender and loving to his 52 nieces and nephews. He also sings and plays the ukulele.

Letters submitted on House's behalf portray him as a likable young man who is a volunteer coach of the lacrosse team at Muirlands Middle School and attends Mesa College in pursuit of a degree in business.

Taylor Bloom, a former La Jolla High cheerleader and a University of California Santa Barbara student, told the court in her letter that “I would trust him with my life.”

Whoa, Taylor! You might want that one back. I mean, House only started a beating that led to the death a friend (allegedly). But I guess you can give House points for his attention to detail:

Police say the fight started between Kauanui and House, but the other three jumped in, punching and kicking the victim even after he was down.

One of the four assailants ran away, two took off in the SUV, and House stayed behind to look for a tooth he lost, Rooney said. A police officer arrived and House was immediately arrested.

Now I don't want to diminish Emery's death. He certainly did not deserve what he got. But details are now surfacing that Emery wasn't exactly an angel. In fact, his actions that night might have provoked a drunken House and the dirtbags he "rolled with" to retaliate:

One of several witnesses laying out the circumstances surrounding the homicide in the early hours of May 24 is Jennifer Grosso.

That night at the Brew House, Grosso said, Kauanui was on the dance floor, moving slowly to the music, when he accidentally spilled his drink on House.

Where this mess all began...the La Jolla Brew House

“I'm not so sure it was an accident,” Rooney said, noting that Kauanui was angry because House was talking to Grosso.

House and Kauanui argued; bouncers separated them and told them to leave. Police have a video shot by a bar patron but won't say what it shows.

Grosso, 20, said she drove Kauanui home in his gray Chevrolet Tracker about half-past midnight.

(An aside. Grosso is just 20 years old. What the hell was she doing in the Brew House that night to begin with?)

A neighbor saw Kauanui pacing outside his mother's house, arguing on his cell phone, about 45 minutes later.

It looks like Kauanui could have avoided the confrontation in the first place. But based on his past, Emery Kauanui was not one to avoid confrontation:

In July 2003, Emery Kauanui Jr., then 20, was charged in Florida with felony battery and spent 32 days in jail for throwing a beer bottle into a man's face.

A year later, Emery and a surfing buddy were involved in a “surf rage” incident at the Oceanside pier, police reported. Kauanui pleaded guilty to misdemeanor battery and was fined $510. In the midst of that case, Kauanui was arrested for drunken driving, pleaded guilty and was sentenced to a first-offenders program, which he failed to complete.

When he died, there was a warrant out for his arrest for violating conditions of probation.

Still...this was a senseless and stupid crime. Perhaps Emery Kauanui should have picked better "friends" than a bunch of morons whose lives circled around getting drunk and getting into fights. No doubt, his choice to hang out with these losers cost him his life.

But there are others who call themselves "Bird Rock Bandits". Listen up, you dweebs. This community will not put up with your garbage and will defend itself against any more thuggery. Take a long look at your buddies...a similar fate awaits you if you keep going down this path. And prison folk won't go easy on spoiled punks like you.

Yesterday's memorial for Emery...300 paddled out at Windansea where Emery's ashes were scattered by his mother.

Gratuitous 80's Video

Just because I felt like it.

Anyone else remember this MTV video?



Afterthoughts: What is it about the name "Lola" and music? I've never actually met any women named "Lola". Is my life missing something?

NY Times plays "the Race Card" (sort of)

The New York Times is whining this morning about the failure of the "comprehensive" immigration reform deal that Bush tried to shove down our throats. Instead of trying to understand why this bill left such a bad taste in the mouths of so many Americans, the Times instead uses the politically-correct word for racist..."nativist."

The anti-immigrant hard-core — no amnesty today, no amnesty tomorrow, no amnesty ever — must not be allowed to hold the nation hostage. Like nativists of generations past, they think the country is being Latinized, and they fear it. The country is changing, but the way it always has, absorbing newcomers, shaping and being shaped by them, inexorably turning them, their children and grandchildren into Americans.

Ignoring the fact that only 23% of Americans were in favor of the legislation, the Times instead blankets those of us who want our borders enforced as scared, simpletons who don't understand this complex issue.

As far as who the "nativists" really are, count the number of American flags in this protest photo:

Click to make larger

Of course you know who's fault all of this is...it's those DARN REPUBLICANS:

The immigration compromise collapsed on the floor of the Senate Thursday night. Many of its hard-line foes are celebrating, but their glee is vindictive and hollow. They have blocked one avenue to an immigration overhaul while offering nothing better, thwarting bipartisanship to satisfy their reflexive loathing for amnesty, which they define as anything that helps illegal immigrants get right with the law.

The tragedy is that the compromise bill was written to bring these restrictionists along, with punitive, detestable provisions that many supporters of comprehensive reform agreed to endorse for the sake of a “grand bargain.” The bill was badly flawed but fixable, as long as there was the possibility of leadership and courage in Congress.

But obstruction happened. Republican amendments, designed to shred the compromise, happened.

When crunch time came on the bill however, the cloture vote included ELEVEN Democrats. Those votes would not have been enough to end debate on this bill (needing 2/3rds), but at least liberals could have pointed at those "obstructionist conservatives" with a little more credibility. As it was, the cloture vote didn't even muster a simple majority.

Technically, all the cloture vote means is that debate can continue. But the Times, George Bush and Ted Kennedy wanted to just ram this bill down our throats without allowing for for proper analysis. Upon scrutiny, this was a flea-bitten dog of a bill. It put amnesty provisions ahead of enforcement. The American people might have supported the provisions that would have helped illegals "get right with the law", but we simply don't believe either Bush or Congress when they promise enforcement:

(Update) Ace also notices the missing Dems in the Times editorial. The Jawas check in with their analysis:

I also love how the article is entitled " A Failure of Leadership," as if the Democrats aren't in control of both Houses of Congress. Somebody page the NYT and let them know that the Democrats shoulder Congressional failure responsibility ever since November of last year. If the widdle babies don't like that, we can arrange a change in 2008.

Is Iowahawk a big enough Prick?

Dave Burge (Iowahawk) has announced his candidacy for the Presidential race of 2008. However, he has not chosen a party affiliation for this run.

As a delegate of the Insufferable Prick Party, I am strongly considering nominating Iowahawk at our upcoming convention , based on his stand on immigration:

We are a nation of immigrants. But whether our ancestors came here through Ellis Island, the Bering Straits Ice Bridge or by intergalactic transporter beam, we must face the fact that our current immigration system is broken. As President, I will make securing the border my top priority. Unfortunately, the Congress has been slow to approve funding for fences and other barriers to illegal immigration. That's why I have proposed wacky Roadrunner-style misdirection signs along the border that read "ESTADOS UNIDOS -- THIS WAY." Hopefully, this will totally confuse illegal border hoppers and their "coyotes," and they will stay up in Canada where they belong.

I hope Iowahawk strongly considers running as a Prick. He needs stiff support and as a Prick, Iowahawk can insert himself firmly into the 2008 Presidential race.

Surf "gangstas" lawyer up

June 28,2008 Update here
I never met Emery Kauanui...hell, I don't even surf. But this story bothers me because a) these kids hang around close to where I live and b) it involves a mindset that is becoming all to prevalent in Southern California.

I stopped by the scene of the crime...outside of the Draper Street condominium where Kauanui was ganged up on and killed. I spent 5 minutes there and at least a dozen local kids came by to pay their respects...a week after Emery's death:

A card reads "Rest in Peace Sweet Emery"

More of the shrine which winds around the corner, a photo of Emery and his mother is at right

It's unfortunate of course that Emery found himself in the company of such garbage. But he did choose his friends:

Emery with his drinking buddy, alleged-murderer Seth Cravens. Cravens flashes a "gang sign"

Somehow these kids got the brilliant idea that it was cool to act like "gangstas". I'll not be sensitive about this...the gang mentality is idiocy. But these kids were not hardened inner-city youths with nothing else to cling to. In fact one (Eric Yanke) had the means to hire uber-defense attorney Kerry Steigerwalt. This was a lifestyle they chose and cultivated among their "friends".

And they flew under the radar. As it turns out, the police are looking at several assaults the "Bird Rock Bandits" may have been involved in.

LA JOLLA – Four young men charged in the slaying of a professional La Jolla surfer are being investigated in connection with as many as 15 other assaults, San Diego police said.

The investigations began after more than a dozen people called police to report similar assaults upon learning about the fatal beating of Emery Kauanui, homicide Lt. Kevin Rooney said. Police on their own reopened two other dormant cases.

(Clockwise) Osuna, Yanke, Cravens and House

Meanwhile, Judge Jeffrey Fraser has reduced bail for the three "Bandits" who remain in jail (Yanke is out on a $1 million bond). Ordinarily I'd be up in arms about this, except that the bail amounts ($1.2 million to $2 million) are still high enough to dissuade these dirtbags from fleeing if their families raise the funds. Of course their attorneys wanted their bail even lower:

Defense attorneys argued unsuccessfully for much lower bail amounts yesterday, citing their clients' strong ties to the community, family support and lack of criminal history. Some of the lawyers mentioned letters they received from members of the community, some of whom were present in court, who could vouch for the defendants' good character.

"Good character"? You mean like, nice wholesome boys whose pastimes include “getting wasted, partying, surfing and womping?”

House's lawyer, Earll Pott, said he filed 43 letters in court from people who described House as “peaceful,” “caring” and “kind.”

You mean, the kind of "peaceful, caring and kind" guy that would beat and kick a drinking buddy, then leave him to die?

Unfortunately, the remnants of these dweebs who call themselves the "Bird Rock Bandits" still don't get it. On their "myspace" page, they promise more mayhem this summer, pledging a "bloodbath."

It's a good bet that the defense attorneys will not be using the defendant's myspace "friends" as character witnesses.

Medical update

It's been two mornings of consultation and tests, and it appears that there might not actually be anything seriously wrong with me.

Oh...other than I'm FAT.

I weighed in at 301 lbs. My driver's license says "265". So I've gained 35lbs in 7 years. That is a bad trend.

My blood pressure is now approaching "normal". I went through all of the heart tests, had blood and urine samples taken, and my blood pressure was taken about 5 times today. I just checked it at home...126/83.

So what happened Monday? Who knows? But I am taking this as my wakeup call. Dairy Queen is about to lose a valuable customer, so if you hold any DQ stock...sell.

Take the high ground

Uncle Jimbo from BlackFive gives us all good advice on how to deal with the left:

John Gibson bitchslaps Truther morons

Johnny Dollar has the audio clip of John Gibson's "interview" with "truther" chimps Matt Lepacek and Luke Rudowksi.

These drooling idiots are running around bragging about being arrested at the New Hampshire Republican Presidential Debate. Gibson had it right when he called them "college fraternity pledges run amok."


Of course you just KNOW who these dweebs support for president:

"What kind of patriot wouldn't be a Ron Paul supporter?"

Right now they are on "Coast to Coast with George Noory...preaching the gospel of 9/11 retardation to the insomniacs who believe in Bigfoot, UFO's and haunted houses.


Not surprisingly...they have a website. I'll not link to it...you can find it yourself if so inclined.

No Porn Here!

Someone logged in here from Istanbul, Turkey and then did a search for "Jenna Jameson".

I didn't know who that was, so I "Googled" her. Turns out she's a porn star.

Uh...I suspect that dude from Turkey was probably some jihadist who was looking to get his groove on behind the back of his mullah.

But for the record...this site has NO porn. And NO Jenna Jameson photos. But if the searches for "porn", and "Jenna Jameson" are going to bring me more traffic...then I'm all for it! Just don't expect to find either on this site.

I will however, put up this fully-clothed photo of Paris Hilton on her way to jail:

Bird Rock "Bandits" update

I was planning an update on the tragic and senseless beating death of Emery Kauanui, but due to my little medical escapade yesterday, I'll be posting a more complete update tomorrow. Please remember to keep Emery's family in your prayers:

RIP Emery

And remember, all of the punks who called themselves the "Bird Rock Bandits" are INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY. At least of this crime...for now.

But they are guilty of one thing. Being stupid enough to think that having a gang mentality is a lifestyle. For the rest of you "Bandits" who aren't in jail yet...grow the hell up.

I thought I was going to die...

Well, yesterday was interesting...

I was in my office when my hands and feet started to go numb and I got very dizzy. I'm 42 and overweight and haven't had a checkup in years. Naturally the first thing I thought was...heart attack?

I was able to recover long enough to quietly gather my things and drive myself to Scripps La Jolla Hospital (fortunately, just down the street from my office).

In the waiting room the numbness increased, I got severe chills and extremely dizzy. I was wondering how much longer it would be before I slipped into unconsciousness and perhaps checked out for good.

A nurse got me back to a bed immediately and all of a sudden I had wires, needles, valves and all sorts of medical gadgetry protruding from my body. It all happened so fast...

My blood pressure was 178/103. I had no idea what those numbers meant, but the doctor explained that was way too high. The doctor told me that unless my blood pressure fell back to under 140/100, that I wasn't leaving.

The EKG results came back and my biggest fear was alleviated...my heart seems to be normal. Still, the doctor wants me to see a cardiologist and to have my blood enzymes checked.

He also wants me to see a neurologist to evaluate my risk for stroke.

A few hours later, my blood pressure finally fell to 137/94...and I heard the best news of the day: I could leave. In fact, the doctor suggested that I attend basketball practice (I coach high school) since he thought it would keep things normal for me (as long as I didn't jump in and start playing).

While all of this was going on, I had some strange thoughts. My first one was...what if I have to spend a few nights in the hospital (or what if I die)...and someone has to go back to my home to pick up (or box up) some belongings? MY BED ISN'T MADE AND I HAVE YESTERDAY'S DIRTY UNDERWEAR ON THE FLOOR (I missed the hamper and was too lazy to pick it up).

How embarrassing...

I also thought of this...my symptoms first started appearing right about the time I began this blog (about 4 days ago). Is blogging some high-pressure endeavor? Does blogging create an obsessive nature? Does the snarkiness inherent with political blogging cover up a rage-mentality that would raise my blood-pressure?

Of course over-analysis of this is kind of a liberal thing...let's study every "underlying" issue that might relieve me of accountability and ignore the elephant in the room:

I'm fat. At least 80lbs heavier than I should be. My diet sucks, I drink way too much coffee, and I don't exercise enough. In other words...THIS IS MY FAULT.

I thought of the recent death of liberal blogger Steve Gilliard (the guy who photo-shopped Michael Steele in black-face and accused him of being a "Sambo"). He died at 41 and he was a hefty dude. He had heart disease (and other health issues) no doubt brought on because of his weight.

He had a proclivity for eating the same garbage I do. And he went through medical hell before his body finally gave out.

There is a current mini-firestorm over at Six Meat Buffet because of Smantix's "eulogy" about Gilliard. Smantix was certainly insensitive for writing such a biting "tribute" only a few hours after Gilliard died.

The same liberal community who spat on Jerry Falwell's corpse before he had gotten cold, is APPALLED that someone would be so insensitive as to write such meanness.

But Gilliard was a rude and sarcastic blogger himself. My bet is that he would have told all those bed-wetters who are so up in arms to get a grip on themselves and quit acting like such babies. At least I'd like to think that.

I know this...certainly I'd like all of my friends to think well of me should I leave this earth prematurely. I also wouldn't give a rat's butt what my detractors said about me...let them fire away.

Who needs a mortgage?

On a telephone pole outside my local golf course:

Looks like the guy's adverstising budget is a little short. So I'm giving him free exposure. Give him a call,he looks like he needs the business I'm sure he'll do a GREAT job for you!

It's Miller Time!

Dennis Miller was on The O'Reilly Factor last week and had some choice commentary on John Edwards, Mitt Romney, Rudy Giuliani and the dim-witted community of Boulder, Colorado.

The money shots:

"I love it when you weighed in on Edwards because to me the guy's just an overly-coiffed pillar of dim..."

(On the Edwards estate): "You see the mother ship right there...I kept looking for the pea-pod people to lead Richard Dreyfuss right up to the front door..."

"There are two Americas...those who buy Edwards and those who think he's a complete phony. I am in the latter camp."

"It's one of the things I have trouble with the Democratic party now when they circle the hybrids , they all get into lockstep with the message..."

"I think that Rudy (Giuliani) as far as terrorism goes is just entering his peak killing years and that's why I'm for him."

(On the Boulder school district): "If I was a parent, I'd walk down there and punch somebody in the nose..."

Enjoy:



Of course Dennis can be a little esoteric with his historical and literary references so to help us all along, here is the beginning of our Dennis Miller glossary:

Clifford Irving: Novelist who wrote the famous fake autobiography of Howard Hughes.

Sir Thomas More: Patron Saint of Lawyers and Statesmen, martyred by Henry VIII
Tom Joad: Destitute protagonist in Steinbeck's Grapes of Wrath

Bass Weejuns: Penny loafers

Heston waking up in the field, the chimp's on top of the pony: Planet of the Apes reference

Keepin' it real with Gary Sheffield (Updated)

In the weeks before the roll-out of this blog, I was lamenting the missed opportunity to blog about moron athletes like Michael Vick, Floyd Landis and Lastings Milledge. I was thinking...what if athletes never did or said anything stupid again?

Well...this didn't take long. Seems noted sociologist Gary Sheffield has a theory as to the rising percentages of Latin ballplayers in the major leagues.

"I called it years ago. What I called is that you're going to see more black faces, but there ain't no English going to be coming out. … [It's about] being able to tell [Latin players] what to do -- being able to control them," he told the magazine.

"Where I'm from, you can't control us. You might get a guy to do it that way for a while because he wants to benefit, but in the end, he is going to go back to being who he is. And that's a person that you're going to talk to with respect, you're going to talk to like a man.

"These are the things my race demands. So, if you're equally good as this Latin player, guess who's going to get sent home? I know a lot of players that are home now can outplay a lot of these guys."

So basically if two ballplayers are "equally good", team management is going to pick the player who is less of a pain in the ass? How RACIST of them!

Of course Gary Sheffield has made a career of being a pain in the ass. That might explain why he's played for 7 different teams despite his considerable talent.

But just so nobody accuses him of being all "uppity", he might want to borrow this from Cynthia McKinney:

Update: Van Helsing over at Moonbattery has his take on Sheffield, along with some video of the Cubs "controlling" one of their Latin ballplayers.

If the Republicans call...(part 2)

If the Republicans call...hang up

Iowahawk has the latest scripts being used by the RNC to pump up their sagging donations.

Although personally I'm in favor of cutting a bunch of these out and sending them in:

Global Terror Moron

Yes, John Edwards...lets move past this.

CBS) NEW YORK Three men were arrested and one was being sought in connection to a plan to set off explosives in a fuel line that feeds John F. Kennedy International Airport and runs through residential neighborhoods, according to an indictment released Saturday.


U.S. Attorney Roslynn R. Mauskopf called it "one of the most chilling plots imaginable."


"The devastation that would be caused had this plot succeeded is just unthinkable," she said at a news conference.

And this moron wants to be President.

Global Warming misses San Diego

From the UT:

While Jax Grimes, 2, of Tucson, Ariz., played on Mission Beach yesterday, the lifeguards behind him took part in some training. Most of May was cool and overcast, with below-average temperatures.

From Time Magazine 1974:

As they review the bizarre and unpredictable weather pattern of the past several years, a growing number of scientists are beginning to suspect that many seemingly contradictory meteorological fluctuations are actually part of a global climatic upheaval.

The trend shows no indication of reversing.

Telltale signs are everywhere...

All of us knucklehead Global Warming deniers have clearly been ignoring what Time Magazine has been trumpeting for 30 years now...a "global climactic upheaval." I feel so stupid for missing all the signs.

OK, let me read a little further:

Climatological Cassandras are becoming increasingly apprehensive, for the weather aberrations they are studying may be the harbinger of another ice age.

Whatever the cause of the cooling trend, its effects could be extremely serious, if not catastrophic.

So according to Time Magazine, we should have been covered in ice by now. But look what happened in San Diego in the years after the article came out that predicted our doom:

The warmest Junes in San Diego, based on average temperature:

1981: 72.9 degrees
1978: 71.3
2006: 70.8
1979: 70.2
1976: 69.7
June average: 67.4

The warmest Julys in San Diego, based on average
temperature:

1984: 77.2 degrees
2006: 76.3
1981: 75.6
1985: 75.3
1959: 73.7
July average: 70.9

Source:
National Weather Service

Right after climate Chicken Littles were chirping that an ice age was coming, the temperatures got a little warmer. Now the same Chicken Littles are screaming about the "global climactic upheaval" that is global warming.

Why should I believe them now? Especially in light of this:

This year, most of May was cool and overcast. In the past three weeks, the thermometer never hit 70 degrees at Lindbergh Field, San Diego's official weather station. On the few days when skies cleared early, a strong sea breeze kept the coastal zone cool. Temperatures were below average on all but five days during the month.

I don't want to have a discussion on how this is just regional, and the alleged problem is global. All I know is...I need to go put on a sweater, I'm cold.

Nobody told me there'd be dreams like these

Strange dreams indeed:

Last night I dreamed a good actress friend of mine handed me a birthday cupcake in the middle of her performance.

The candle was a lit cigarette.

Most peculiar, Mama...

(with apologies to John Lennon)

Let them eat cheese...

On the front page of today's San Diego Daily Worker Union Tribune:

What's for lunch? Stigma sandwich
Chula Vista kids with cafeteria bills get cheese, bread

Looks like good protein to me...

It seems that some parents in the Chula Vista school district have been a little tardy in paying the $1.50 per day cost of a daily school lunch. So until their bills are paid, their children are given a cheese sandwich, salad, and milk.

But predictably, a couple of liberals have just got to have a little whine with that cheese:

When parents fall three meals behind, their child finds a check mark on his personalized lunch card when he picks it up at the beginning of the cafeteria line. That tells him he has no choice but cheese.

It also brands him with a culinary scarlet letter, detractors say; the cheese sandwich unfairly broadcasts that a student has deadbeat parents.

William Perno and Alice Coronado, who have children in district schools, have lobbied for the abolition of the alternate meal for seven months.

“Instead of choosing to hold the parents responsible, they (Chula Vista schools) implemented the alternate meal to have the child be the messenger about the account,” said Coronado, a social worker.

Perno suggests getting tougher with recalcitrant parents: demand letters, reports to credit bureaus and the use of collection agencies. He even suggested siccing the district attorney on them.

Now that's a terrific idea. Collection agencies all over the county would surely like to spend their time running down those $6 collection accounts. And we certainly don't want the DA wasting his time prosecuting gang members, drunk drivers and murderers...he needs to be going after REAL criminals like these deadbeat parents.

Before you think I am picking on parents who can't afford the regular school lunch:

None of this applies to the poor. There really is such thing as a free lunch, and Chula Vista serves 6,000 of them daily to children from low-income households.

The problem is those who can afford to pay but don't, Doyle said, and restricting lunch choice has proved to be an attention-getter.

When the Chula Vista School District started the cheese sandwich program, they were running a deficit of $285,000. Now that deficit is down to $68,000. 15 miles to the north, the Santee school district runs a similar program and it's lunch program debt has been completely eradicated.

But leave it to liberal whiners like Perno and Coronado who want to use costly resources at taxpayer expense so that kids can avoid the "stigma" of having to eat a cheese sandwich.

The kicker? It turns out Perno and Coronado are making a big stink about nothing:

In fact, some kids want the cheese sandwich, and there are unconfirmed reports that kids have thrown away their bag lunches to get it.

American Towelhead

From Hot Air...get a load of this douche:



From SoCal wuss to al-Zawahiri's Girl Friday...

Opening Day

Welcome to This Goes to 11.

I am relatively new to the blogging community. I discovered it in a backwards kind of way. One day I was watching Michelle Malkin on The O'Reilly Factor, and I was impressed with two things:

1. Wow. Michelle is smart.

2. WOW! Michelle is a BABE.

So I "Googled" Michelle...turns out she has a blog. I soon became hooked by her wit and straight-forward analysis (the "babe" thing became a non-factor...she's married with kids).

Then I started clicking on her links...and discovered there was an entire world full of people who suddenly had a voice. One didn't need a journalism degree, a syndicated column or a radio talk show in order to be heard.

I was hooked.

To date, my only involvement in the blogging community has been as a snarky commenter on a few select sites. That changes today. From here on, I hope to be a snarky blogger...because Lord knows there aren't enough of THOSE out there.

Before we throw out the first pitch, very special thanks to my friends at Six Meat Buffet. Preston, Cranky and Smantix...thank you very much for all of your help and encouragement. Rest assured, me and my special group of nitwit pals intend on being a part of your site for as long as you'll have me.

OK, a quick note about the site. Clearly, anyone with knowledge of the movie "This is Spinal Tap" will recognize the title of the blog. And yes, I know that Nigel Tufnel actually says "These Go to 11"....but I am going with a more grammatically correct title. What follows is the inspiration for the title (for those of you who are unfamiliar):




Play Ball!

Boyz in My 'hood

(June 28, 2008 Update go here)

Duuude...this is so messed up:

LA JOLLA – What started as a bar fight in La Jolla ended with the brutal death of 24-year-old Emery Kauanui, who police say was beaten by four men and left for dead in front of his mother's condominium.

Kauanui, a pro surfer who grew up in La Jolla, died Monday from a head injury. The young man known as “Junior” to family and friends grew up with the men accused of killing him.

“They were all acquainted, going all the way back to grammar school,” homicide Lt. Kevin Rooney said.

Seth Cravens, 21; Eric House, 20; Orlando Osuna, 22; and Matthew Yanke, 20, are being held for suspicion of murder, Rooney said.

Emery "Junior" Kauanui, a victim of senseless gang violence?

Surfers are, by nature, docile creatures. This would sort of be the equivalent of a pack of wild dolphins turning on one of their own.

I am not a surfer myself (anyone who knows me would combust with laughter if they pictured me on a longboard), but I live among them. Looking outside my window right now, I see four wetsuits hanging out to dry. The stereotype of the "mellow surfer dude" is absolutely accurate. Usually the only way to rile up a surfer is to steal his wave.

But now it appears there is a new threat. It turns out that these MURDEROUS THUGS were part of a SURF GANG:

LA JOLLA – Four men scheduled to be arraigned in Superior Court today in the La Jolla beating death of 24-year-old surfer Emery Kauanui call themselves part of a “crew” known as the Bird Rock Bandits.

According to the group's MySpace profile, their passions include “getting wasted, partying, surfing and womping.”

Tough Guys" on their way to a California "pound me in the ass" prison

What's especially disturbing is that it turns out these LOSERS have been terrorizing the neighborhood just two blocks away from me for a while now. And the SDPD dropped the ball:

Dozens of readers posted comments to the online version of yesterday's news story in The San Diego Union-Tribune. The “Rants and Raves” section on the local CraigsList Web site teemed with commentary on what happened the night of the assault, and of 0ther violent incidents involving the Bird Rock Bandits.

Some messages offered support for the four men. But many alleged that Cravens and the others committed previous assaults, including some for which police reports were taken but criminal charges were never pursued.

“If the police had followed up after I made my report, at least these guys would have been on notice and maybe Emery would still be alive,” Michael Johnson said in an interview yesterday.

Johnson, 34, is a stock trader who lives in Point Loma. He said that on the night of May 8, he and a friend, Chris Horning, were getting out of their car in front of The Shack, a La Jolla bar near Horning's house.

“Four guys and two girls were getting into a car,” Johnson said. “One guy said something to my friend. I went over to calm things down and got sucker-punched in the face.”

Johnson, who said neither he nor Horning had so much as spoken to the men, said he was knocked to the ground and pummeled. He said Horning was told he would be killed if he interfered. The attackers fled after Horning recited their license-plate number aloud, Johnson said.

Horning the next day visited his alma mater, La Jolla High School, and with the help of a vice principal identified three of the attackers, including Cravens, from yearbook photos, Johnson said.

Johnson then reported the assault to San Diego police, but said he was told it would be “10 to 14 days before they would do anything.”

“I gave them names. I had photos of my face all purple and bruised,” Johnson said. It was so frustrating. And then I learned about Emery's death.”

Homicide Detective Sandi Oplinger said yesterday that Johnson was not the only resident to report having been assaulted by the Bird Rock Bandits.

“I would urge anyone with information about assaults by these young men to call us. My number is (619) 531-2831,” Oplinger said.

Gee...thanks Sandi. NOW you want information on these PUNKS.

OK, to be fair it's easy to see why this was not on the SDPD's radar. Surfers=gang bangers just does not compute. Shake down one of the local surfers and you'll probably get a misdemeanor possession bust.

But still, there were signs:

Some members of the Bird Rock Bandits maintained MySpace pages that glorified their love of football, drinking, drug use and other activities, although several of the sites have been edited since the arrests.

Osuna's MySpace page lists his interests as girls, watching football, skateboarding and snowboarding. He says he would like to meet Bob Marley, the reggae-music legend, who died in 1981.

Here's hoping Osuna gets his wish...courtesy of the California Judicial System.

Osuna, you moron loser...hope you enjoy "rolling" on death row

A Fond Farewell

Through streaming tears and sudden pangs for Indigo Girls music and LPGA golf, I composed this touching tribute to two of our favorite targets pillars of social conscience:




Of course, it's just my fortune that the Rotund Oracle and St. Cindy decided to "retire" the week I begin blogging. They would have been such great melba toast whilst I cut my teeth in the blogging world.

Hmm...who could possibly replace them? Please please please...let this be true!


Update: Looks like I'm not the only one lamenting Rosie's departure. And perhaps I should have left this tribute thing to the pros....

We are NOT Alone!

So...what are you doing this weekend?


The reason I ask is that you will want to set aside at least an hour to read, dissect and digest the first part of the latest essay by Bill Whittle.


Yes...his essays are LONG. But hang with them; you will find them to be some of the best thought-out arguments against liberal stupidity you will ever read.


For example, have you ever traveled to a 3rd world country and wondered why this is allowed to happen?

When I look out into the Third World, this is what I see: short-term strategies for immediate gain at the cost of long-term success. A swarm of trinket vendors on a beach in Mexico all need to make an immediate sale in order to eat that day, even if the cost is being so annoying and frustrating to the tourists that it prevents them from ever returning. Short term gain, long term loss.

Do you see any long-term disadvantages to an arrangement like the one above? I mean, aside form the obvious fire risk, who is actually paying for all that stolen electricity? And in a Screw the Other Guy society, why should he pay? He spends money, for what gain? Why not just steal it like everyone else? And when no one pays, guess what happens to the the electricity. It goes away.

Hmm. Doesn't that sound a little like the M.O. for the millions of illegal aliens who have crossed our borders? Whittle makes that connection:

Large numbers of non-citizens want to live in the United States. Large numbers. A society can only assimilate so many people in a given year. If millions and millions of people come here illegally, they are loading the system to capacity at the expense of the honest, decent people who are doing the right thing by applying to immigrate legally. If we reward illegal immigration with amnesty, we have allowed the illegals not only to screw our own people and laws, but even more so they harm their own countrymen who are trying to get here by cooperating.

The biggest losers in our inability to control illegal immigration are the legal immigrants. What benefit do these honest people gain from playing by the rules? This is as clear a real-world example as you are likely to see of the lack of retaliation flipping a system from cooperation to betrayal.

And, by allowing this to happen, you also set a precedent, which I think is even more destructive: you are saying not only to the illegals but to the entire society that laws are for chumps. Cheaters win.

There is so much more I'd like to lift from Whittle's essay...but it is his essay, not mine. Set aside some time and go read it.



Part 2 of his essay is also out and it follows part 1 on eject!eject!eject!.com. I'll get into part 2 next week...right now I am still masticating on part 1.

Am I a Racist?

So I'm watching Sportscenter and this commercial comes on:




Now I'm thinking...a black guy who likes Twisted Sister? Uh...I don't think so.

I must be a racist for even thinking this...right?

Someone please bail me out here.




OK, now I'm thoroughly confused...

What a Slob!

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Holy Cow! Can you imagine the carbon footprint that would be emitted if someone lit a match?

Dude...seriously. Get a maid!

Props to Glenn McCoy...

...cartoonist extraordinaire! He's not usually political, but this one made me spray my Sunday Morning coffee...




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Since I am pretty sure I have just violated some copyright infringement laws, make sure you go over to UComics to read Glenn's stuff...